ok - officially - i'm not so retarded - i think i may be doing at least one thing right;
so today was a good day - i recieved an unexpected call from a lovely someone that was just a simple hello - it made me feel all warm and fuzzy - ha.
but as i sit here this evening - i feel the melancholy feelings creeping in:
i'm happy to leave, and honestly can't fucking wait to leave - but then let's be honest, i really don't know when i'll be back for more than a week - nor do I know if I want to be.
I'm moving from the point in my life where my parents were involved in what i did and how i did things -
not to say that they were controlling - by no means - i'm merely saying that even though i was away from them, they still were guiding me
at this point, provided i get myself a nice paying job - other than financial help - i'm breaking away; i'm going to be old enough to do what i see fit - i won't need help buying booze or worrying about the same thing 15-18 year olds do.
yea - i'm still 12 at heart - but this is the verge - i'm moving from that boyhood/teen stage to that 20's stage [i'm not going to say i'm going to be a man, because its all relitive - personally your not a man until you have your own house, are financially independent - and perhaps have a wife/kids]
i am not going to school this year - i am moving to portland. this is a full out move - i'm moving into an apartment and staying there a full year - and then probably again another full year (or half a year and then another half in england to finish college at)
but enough bullshitting - 5 more fuckin days - and then i think i will be in mexico for a nice vacation - then off to portland to get a job and kick back and just wait until i hit the big 21
friday...friday...friday...friday...
friday...and it all changes - but it all still stays the same
i'm not saying a new life; i'm not saying goodbye
just saying
so today was a good day - i recieved an unexpected call from a lovely someone that was just a simple hello - it made me feel all warm and fuzzy - ha.
but as i sit here this evening - i feel the melancholy feelings creeping in:
i'm happy to leave, and honestly can't fucking wait to leave - but then let's be honest, i really don't know when i'll be back for more than a week - nor do I know if I want to be.
I'm moving from the point in my life where my parents were involved in what i did and how i did things -
not to say that they were controlling - by no means - i'm merely saying that even though i was away from them, they still were guiding me
at this point, provided i get myself a nice paying job - other than financial help - i'm breaking away; i'm going to be old enough to do what i see fit - i won't need help buying booze or worrying about the same thing 15-18 year olds do.
yea - i'm still 12 at heart - but this is the verge - i'm moving from that boyhood/teen stage to that 20's stage [i'm not going to say i'm going to be a man, because its all relitive - personally your not a man until you have your own house, are financially independent - and perhaps have a wife/kids]
i am not going to school this year - i am moving to portland. this is a full out move - i'm moving into an apartment and staying there a full year - and then probably again another full year (or half a year and then another half in england to finish college at)
but enough bullshitting - 5 more fuckin days - and then i think i will be in mexico for a nice vacation - then off to portland to get a job and kick back and just wait until i hit the big 21
friday...friday...friday...friday...
friday...and it all changes - but it all still stays the same
i'm not saying a new life; i'm not saying goodbye
just saying
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
It is possible to live under the guidance of your parents while still living an independent life. I can't remember the last time my dad gave me advice and yet, I still feel like he is my strongerst influence, simply because I respect him so much. I am not "daddy's little girl" any more per se, but I still remember where I came from. (and I still let him spoil me every now and then.
And hey, it sounds like you, me and howdypartner will have to check out Sinferno Cabaret or Scooter's Jello shots when you get back. (both decidely un-gay)