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haydin

Oregon

SG Since 2008

Followers 8350 Following 543

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Saturday Mar 28, 2009

Mar 28, 2009
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Aloha and happy Saturday everyone, thought I would wake up and say hello before I go to work =). Anyways Im happy and sad today, happy because I'm almost done planning my Vegas trip for my 21st in May YAY, getting everything finalized and what not, super excited and Im also happy about shooting a new set with Lorelei in April =D.I know that will be fun.
Anyways I was kinda bummed when I started reading on the boards about the new layout and how a lot of girls are saying Hopefuls should be taken off the front page completely basically because it makes the front page look cheap, or because it reminds them of a myspace "comment on my pic" type of deal. Honestly not all of us are comment whores, I don't go around begging for comments on my set, im flattered so many of you have been so kind on here, but I feel like a lot of SG's are just bashing the Hopefuls and forgetting that they werent always SG's themselves, and for those who have been here a while need to think about the fact that competition to become a SG unfortunately is A LOT tuffer now because so many people know about it.
I've gone back and looked at sets from 2003 and so on, and the quality has changed profusely in the past few years. I understand that yes because SG has become so well known A LOT of girls just want to do it for the title, but I know many of us including myself who are Hopefuls aren't here for that.
Personally I've wanted to be a SG since before I was old enough to do so, not because of the "Title" but because I found a community of people who stood up for what they believed in, women who basically symbolized change in a world that is still not as accepting as they should be, artists,writers photographers, thinkers who found an appreciation for more than just outer beauty.
I love the people here and I want to become a SG so I can be more a part of it, I would love to go out to events, and have the chance to get to know these women more without being though of as a"wannabe" I think hopefuls still deserve a fighting chance to have a spot on the front page because there are still those of us who are here for the right reasons , not to be naked on the internet but to celebrate true beauty and strength in life.
I really do love it here and I've made some wonderful friends, I understand fully where a lot of SG are coming from when they get frustrated with new hopefuls because times change and a LOT of the girls out there like I said before just want it for the popularity, but please remember there are those of us who are truly inspired by you ladies, and part of becoming a SG is up to public opinion because without them Suicide Girls would not be what it is today.
Anyways I hope you all have a wonderful day, and I do hope no one takes this the wrong way or tells me im whining because I am in no way doing so, this is just how I honestly feel at the moment and everyone is entitled to their own opinion.
xoxox
Haydin

Dreamer Lost
Wind charms and ashes traces of lust
down by the shore line in faces of dust
I write for you symbols
you bleed for me blood
I'll never forget this place you call home
darling im praying im waiting for change
wasting away in old ocean waves
saying come home now
watch Carly play
you are just an image tossed in the sand
waiting for change
on impossible land
I find words to tell you
yet my lips arent quite right
crimson and cracked
from tears throught last night
you were a mystery
a phantom so bright
yet I missed your hand prints
and burnt out the light
Carly come play now
you can't say you know
this place has no rain now
no heart and no soul
I wrote for you widows of spindles spun clear
spiders and moon beams
these tangible webs
why cant you see past shades of worn gray
little girl frozen in threaded old seams
close your cold hands dear
no need to fight
this place has died dear in shadows tonight

a quick little...errr...well kind of a poem about a strange dream I had....more of a fast free write.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
shoegazerbrett:
hip hip hooray!
Mar 28, 2009
darkriver:
love kiss
I couldn't agree with you more honey. The profound changes over the past few years has many questioning why they are still here. It seems to be more about popularity, not individuality. It does seem that they are pushing hopefuls away, and why? so it's easier for them to get their own sets live? They already have the status of SG, so why can't they share it? You know I love your sets, and will always support you and my other friends who are hopefuls as well. I just want to make sure they never have you become "nopefuls".
Love you girl
Mar 29, 2009

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