Well i had an alright weekend and sunday night was fantastic but now i just want to relive the pain i cant stand being alone. being bymyself is pain and it's making me want to drink and hurt myself i cant wait til thursday when my rents get home. i wont feel at all the same I hope! I just want to do it all again i just want to die for all my sins and all my misfortunes toninght i will be drinking alone at home and hope to hell i wont do anything stupid. i finally cried on saturday night due to lovely msgs from a beatiful girl we know as Pondercherrylee. I thank her so much for it cause it released some pressure but i want more release. maybe i should get another tattoo get drunk and bleed from it maybe that'll help. I don't know but this is starting to feel kinda the same as my worst year aka 2005. i can't handle it but i can still go bout work if i could work almost 24hours a day i would. i think it would take my mind off everything. maybe i should ask my old job AKA BP if i could do like drag again as well as butchery. it might be a pain in the arse but it'll keep me occupied. fuck i can't stand this hell of a feeling i just wanna cut deep into my heart and relive the preassures of love lift the pain of feelings.
FUCK THIS CRAP HOLE OF A LIFE!
FUCK THIS CRAP HOLE OF A LIFE!
Do you have any friends that can come over or maybe you can go to their place,just to get you out of home and mixing with other people.
Did i read that right,did you usedto do drag ?, i havnt seen a decent drag show in ages..the last show i saw was actually a drag king show and it was cool..twas done by a anarcho-feminest collective at a local warehouse space
Anyway mate, i hope your day improves..take care and remember you have friends out there who do care