Hi, I’m Hartt, i’ve been a hopeful since 2018.
Over the past week i’ve been writing this, deleting, re-typing, looking back on my whole time here. I will go into this saying this isn’t meant to be a negative post as much as it is me hopeful for change. I’ve decided to practice the right to have a voice/be heard. So with that, take what you will from this and please know this is straight from my eyes, ears, and heart. I have everything to lose, and nothing to gain but my own peace of mind by writing this.
The Hopeful IG is dead and it feels like no one cares about us. I hope to see this change in hopes to make life easier for existing/future hopefuls.
If no one can run the hopeful page properly, maybe have a trusted SG/SGH step up and give a little help. Why can’t hopefuls stream on Onlyfans?
Twitter? You’re only shared if you’re SOTD and there’s a lot of missed fan-building opportunities because no one is seeing us or our hard work.
New model to SG? This part is especially for you so keep reading.
If you’re recruited, congratulations you have a head start, I advise asking your recruiter every question that comes to your mind. They are there to help you get the leg up.
If you’re recruited by anyone in HQ, you’re fast tracked.
I’ve been told by someone personally that they were sought out and fast tracked and have heard through the grapevine that others have too. I’ve seen many sets be delayed… including mine. I have a sneaking suspicion it’s due to the fast tracking. The set most affected was Metanoia, delayed several times and it was truly *soul-crushing* to be pushed back. Yes, I took it personally.
Anyways, booboo my set was delayed- it still came out eventually, so that’s that.
Hopefuls-join the discord server, it’s definitely worth it. @eirenne got me in there when didn’t hear back from @lemon (thank you Eirenne!) Discord perks: You get to find women that fit you, help share, support, etc. That’s something that was harder to find on SG’s site… which maybe means its time to update the site and enable ‘real time “chat groups, much like discord. More active models and more effort on the SG site. Your staff is using another platform to talk to models, does no one see something wrong here?! Having girls go live on the site should definitely be an attraction, but you have them going live on another site where they have an hour slot, cannot exceed 1 hour of stream time, or exceed $100 in tips. You’re probably going to also be kicked off your SG OF live by the model that streams next by them prematurely logging in. Find a way to encourage your models to stream on site, introduce free ways to interact in lives like stickers/emoji’s, a heart button to spam like instagram, coins, live contest, or D U O S T R E A M I N G (I’ll touch back on this)
If you are an official, you are not paying for your sets shot by trusted/staff while hopefuls are digging out thousands for a shoot fest in the hopes of maybe getting $500 back. You’re ultimately paying, traveling, and collabing to be accepted/recognized. After years of spending money to give SuicideGirls content for free, I feel that the amount that’s put in by the girls are not mirrored by SG.
This isn’t just hopefuls.
Whatever kind of “revamp” of OG SG’s is going on, it’s literally pushing a lot of your “newly” official models out. I’ve been seeing several sets being bought at a really low amount of likes while some of your other officials have sets with almost 3,000 and they aren’t purchased. That is weird to me. Your members clearly like this set and 3k is a lot of likes IMO.
When asking staff how they choose what sets are shared on socials, I was told the people who run socials post in order accordingly to when the set drops. This must be a joke, right? Before having @Rambo archive a few sets, out of 13 sets, only 2 pictures since 2018 were shared.
TAGS!
(THIS IS FOR OFFICIALS AND HOPEFULS!)
The amount of times i’ve seen a post not tagged correctly or at all makes me SO sad. 1 single post with an @ could drastically change one of your model’s life. Even if it’s for a short period, like a sale to their small business that would help them with a bill or even just give them a burst of serotonin. Make your people who do the most remember why they’re so happy to be apart of Suicidegirls.com. A suggestion, I know y’all get busy, but please triple check your posts and make sure your model is taken care of. A happy model makes for a happy company. I also feel like photographers need to be tagged as it would help with their bookings as well. I know names are different sometimes, so this is a loose suggestion.
Favoritism is real, who’s the top 3-5 girls you see? In the case you want your best shot of success, work with @Penny. If you’re lucky enough for her to respond to you, consider yourself a rare gem.
In my experience, along with some others telling me stories, trying to reach out to her is a nightmare. August 2018 I asked how much it was to book her via email and asked about booking via DM. Never got one response after years. Outside looking in, it seems she chooses who to work with, not who is trying to book and work for the company. I should have taken that as a sign back then.
Side note- some will say “she’s busy!” Yes, we all are. I’m a mother working 60-100 hour weeks and still try and find the time from 2018-2021 to respond to a model or photographer, a simple “no” is better than being ignored. Make an auto reply about bookings, or not accepting bookings. Which is bringing me to my next point… At the end of the day SG is a business and should be treated as such. If you’re always too busy, make sacrifices, or don’t accept the role. When you’re staff it’s no longer just about YOU. @rambo never missed reply to me, and honestly I miss her as model coordinator.
Like most business’s, Suicidegirls is clicky. Pay attention to who cares and at what point they decide to start caring. I’ve been sitting on some feelings for a couple of years and I have come to the conclusion that a lot of what SG “stands for” isn’t actually practiced. Curvy girls are few and far between. Black women, Asian women, Indian women, basically all but white women are all few and far between. You can’t pick 2 curvy girls and 2 women of color to constantly post and call yourself all inclusive and “redefining beauty.” I’m active on the site, I see more women of color, I see Curvy, I don’t see them being shared and I rarely see them bought. If your member base only wanted to see skinny white women they could pull up a Victoria’s Secret catalog.
Every single set is done in the same “bright clean” look where sometimes turns out way too overexposed. As a photographer I feel this needs change. The site needs variety. Give us moody vibes, make us feel things from your set instead. BE DIFFERENT. Show your soul and passion for the arts. People get so set in their ways they find what’s working and decide to play it safe. Stand out and shine, baby!
Also…Cosplay is “cool” now but they’ll only share the same Velma look (sorry not sorry for the jab.)
The member count feels so far gone it’s a wonder anyone new is getting bought… I wish I could see the member count- the 2k like system needs to be lowered. You’re once again setting it up to where only staff/well known sg’s are being purchased as they’re the only ones with an already built fan base to show up on feed.
Merch! How has this not been called out by anyone loudly? It runs small and it seems no one notices or cares. Whether it’s because they’re tiny themselves or just not wearing their own clothes. I can’t rep merch when I can’t properly wear it. Also, When you pink a model, why not ask their size for their model package?
With a few things I talked about, I am officially giving up making content/shooting for SuicideGirls.com as I cannot afford to put more time, money, and heartbreak into this company. If by some crazy shift in the universe I’m bought, I will start shooting again, but for now I’m a mother, I can’t afford travel, food, gas/tickets, babysitter, Air bnb deposit and the extra $500+ to shoot with at least 2 photographers, all while maintaining my home life expenses.
After publishing this I understand I’m lowering my chances. At the end of the day staying silent wont make my life any better. I’ve been on a self love journey and learning to stand up for what I believe and here’s where I ended up.
I will still be around for members that are always talking to me and supporting models, as long as i’m not shut out after sharing my feelings.
Please, we beg you, introduce duo streaming! I would have been live every single day having a smoke session with another model, playing games with my SG bestie, or just getting to hang with new girls. That would have been such a rad thing to have during lockdown and would have shown your models (your brand) practicing safety and social distancing by choosing to kick it virtually on your site. *sigh* This one is so tricky to bring up… “Suicide” is such a “bad” word to social media these days that I believe you, as a company, are being suppressed across the board. Rebranding may need to happen to save what you’ve worked 20 years for. I hope you can see I do have a passion for SG and want to see another 20 years of alternative pinup. So if you have questions or concerns, or would like to pick my brain, feel free to message/email me. Silence doesn’t encourage change and I know me going against the grain will cause negative attention for myself, but I have to continue to be unapologetically me. Please take into consideration the people who work really hard for you, even if they don’t have 100k+ Followers on social media(s). Make SuicideGirls what it used to be.
A look back on my SG journey, I see many of my downfalls mainly in earlier sets. I chose to keep them up to show my progress as a model and a woman despite being told multiple times I would have a better shot at being pink if I took them down.
My first set was selfshot with a tripod, and a bluetooth shutter, and an iphone8 in my backyard. It’s amazing to see how my modeling and the quality of my sets have improved since uploading Sunkissed.
(and yes the hair ties drive me insane)
Luminosity what a beautiful set…infected with a hair tie
Solitude was a tad dark but the hair tie wasn’t.
Ataraxia rainbows, bad makeup, and hair tie.
Fairmount coffee, blue wall, and dammit! A hair tie.
Drop the game = hair tie cuz I didn’t learn my lesson.
Metanoia Ya’ll I did it… I lost the hair tie and weight!
Crave you is when I really started to come out of my shell, I felt amazing after losing weight & relearning how to model my new body.
My Last set as a Hopeful: Hartt in bloom I knew this was my last shot. I feel the name fit perfectly. I’m blooming.
Thank you for those who have made it this far. I know writing is not my strong suit but I don’t think I could have have confidently made a video. Thank you for reading my views, I hope you don’t see this as a malicious post. That’s the last thing I want to come off as.
Until next time,
XoXo Hartt

