So this post will be an emotional one and I’m sorry.
Yesterday at 6:05pm I said goodbye to my boy Chico. He had been in my life for 14 years and I’m still trying to process the loss. He had been sick for a while, he had kidney disease. On his check up yesterday they said that we tried everything we could and his kidneys were truly failing him. It was like my world was ending all over again. I lost my cousin a few years ago, my step dad and my friend a few years after and losing someone you love is the worst thing to ever go through. I feel stupid comparing losing a dog to a person but it feels like that. Chico was more than a pet, he was family, my best friend, my companion from high school to adulthood.
I’m tired of goodbyes, im tired of missing loved ones but it’s part of life. I hate it. I know that no matter how hard this decision was to make, it was truly the right one. Chico was so unwell and I know now that he’s happy. I just feel lost...the house is quieter even though he wasn’t noisy. Tonight I watched tv without him at my feet or hearing him snore.
I keep thinking how I hoped he realised how much he helped me during the really dark times in my life. How he made me feel loved and safe. I told him as he was dying in my arms, I hope that even though dogs can’t speak that the bond we shared was enough for him to know my love for him was real.
I hope so much he knows that.
Anyway
I hope those reading this give their furry family members the biggest hug from me because saying goodbye to my boy has broken my heart once again.