wow, so in such a strange place right now.
i am not who i want to be or living the life i want to live or doing what i want to do. im getting by. this reality frustrates me sometimes, wen i think about it. i keep thinking, if i could just make some money and get my passport and go travelling i could get on with my life, but really, i need to get up off my ass. i need to create myself.
however, i do think, it being winter time really goes against my motivation. i just dont want to go outside!
right, so if i WERE who i want to be, living the life i want to live and doing what i want to do, who would i be, how would i live and what would i be doing?
WHO: a kick ass rocker chick with tattoos who isnt so hard on people but who people respect. striking looks and personality with a badass air about me but really sweet as pie.
LIVING: i skate, surf, dance and DJ and even model for some friends who need models for their stuff and all in a hot country on the coast.
DOING: i write, photograph and film my life around me.
this picture of me
really shows me who i want to be, i like how i look in this picture. fierce. going somewhere, doing something. i gotta remember, stripping is just a means to an end so i need to get a part time bartending job to give me something else to do, as well as a steady income.
i want to get a laptop, lush bahari longboard and camcorder.
i hav been working long hours on a new site, i am determined to get some money from this. its a good creative outlet.
anyway, i am tired and sore from spending too many hours at my pc. adios!
i am not who i want to be or living the life i want to live or doing what i want to do. im getting by. this reality frustrates me sometimes, wen i think about it. i keep thinking, if i could just make some money and get my passport and go travelling i could get on with my life, but really, i need to get up off my ass. i need to create myself.
however, i do think, it being winter time really goes against my motivation. i just dont want to go outside!
right, so if i WERE who i want to be, living the life i want to live and doing what i want to do, who would i be, how would i live and what would i be doing?
WHO: a kick ass rocker chick with tattoos who isnt so hard on people but who people respect. striking looks and personality with a badass air about me but really sweet as pie.
LIVING: i skate, surf, dance and DJ and even model for some friends who need models for their stuff and all in a hot country on the coast.
DOING: i write, photograph and film my life around me.
this picture of me
![](https://bp1.blogger.com/__NxHbBXtyCo/ReTjKBH3CgI/AAAAAAAAAAM/xuPTKfMZw7Y/s1600/PAY.gif.jpg)
really shows me who i want to be, i like how i look in this picture. fierce. going somewhere, doing something. i gotta remember, stripping is just a means to an end so i need to get a part time bartending job to give me something else to do, as well as a steady income.
i want to get a laptop, lush bahari longboard and camcorder.
i hav been working long hours on a new site, i am determined to get some money from this. its a good creative outlet.
anyway, i am tired and sore from spending too many hours at my pc. adios!
the 'who' part sounds like you already.
sometimes i feel like i really need to change the person i am but its hard.