My father was a man built from his own broken pieces, blooming the same idled flowers that were his daughter, and sons. Day by day and step by step I unraveled threads only to an ever more complicated nothing that filled my fathers place. I never really knew him, I just wished I hadEither for me or him. What I wanted was the elaborate treasure I had created in the dwellings of my own imagination. The genius I sought beyond what I saw, but never tapped, or knew if what I had thought was really there. He was brilliant in what he created as the image of me buried in himself along with his real voice. I miss him so much and don't even know it. I knew him so well and never even realized it. He was my DadThe one that would give me two shiny quarters on a Sunday morning when I was aching for the ice cream man too drive by, and I never even knew why he waited by the entrance of the metal gate watching me make the purchase. Watching me make a mess and spill Popsicle all over myself that was it. He invested in the memory and my smile as I walked back to show him what I bought. The problem was, I never invested enough time in him to speak to his sorrows and set him free of his everyday aching, not just Sunday. I wish I had said "I love you" before I was buried in pride and anger of the hell I never realized I had build myself down the line. I really do miss you and the thoughts, ideas and time we never really shared. Now buried six feet under your secrets are kept and doubt and hurting is what I have left. I am sorry I did not know you more.
Hanz The King Of Pirates
Hanz The King Of Pirates
lizzi:
I'm sorry to hear this, I hope you feel better
loca:
WOW I feel that pain you spread so neatly on this screen....my Dad is my favorite guy ever but he did that to all of my brothers and I feel thier pain as well , my mother never loved. LOCA rose above her and is bigger BITCH THAN SHE COULD EVER BE! I am cold as ice right now, I had to let one go I loved and left like a sick puppy at his master's funeral ready to go pee on a new persons carpet till I can stop crying. I dumped him and I am crying. WHY? DID I LOVE AND LOOSE OR WAS HE JUST NO GOOD AND I LOVE MYSELF ENOUGH TO GET OUT WHILE I WAS STILL AHEAD? Kisses to you and love to your puppy too thanks for a beautiful way that you experssed your pain I was already in the morbid mode I slapped him when I dumped him though he would never choke me when we fucked anyways fuck it....mmmmm yeah I will go to sleep now and I hope you will be in my dreams kissing the tears away from each others blackened hearts and move on to new dreams where we live happily ever after with happy seeds of helthy babies who are loved and grow up secure that they are secure and we can become new creatures in a world surrounded by good friends and lovers that will be so good to us..........