So here's the deal, yo. There's been a lot of turmoil around these parts and it's really been getting to me. I'll just sort of share the bits I'm comfortable talking about. The rest of the people who care probably know the rest.
I really miss my close family. My sister, brother-in-law and nephew moved to Berkeley, CA in February. My sister and I are very close. Best friends in the whole world. Sis came to town a couple weeks ago and it just got me missing them more. I'm missing my nephew growing up. I'll be in Berkeley for Labor Day weekend, Thanksgiving and we'll be together for Christmas in Bend. It's just not the same as living across the street from each other. *sigh*
Devo is living in Northern New York, he's my brother-in-law's best friend and pretty much a part of the family. We play some pretty damaged music together, highly inspired by binge drinking and watching Lost in Translation. It's the common activities that keep us together, yo. He'll be back in October for the winter and we'll get to drive up the mountain. He'll snowboard and I'll play Unreal Tournament in the lodge, or I'll do my homework-- novel concept.
I've also been feeling that some of my friends need my attention too much, and others don't seem to need me at all. There are some people I want to get to know better, but it seems like I have people standing in my way. I just want to have some kind of balance. I need to have a little more fun, and lord knows I'm trying.
I was thinking about looking for a girlfriend, but they never solve problems. They just help you gloss over your problems until they become a problem themselves. I'm not much into dating. The whole mating ritual, small talk crap, makes me sick. It's a hell of a paradox loop, eh? I don't even think I'd remember what to do if I had a nice lady friend. Do people still go to the movies?
There's this thing I do, this activity.. The people there always help me to get my mind off these things. I never fail to smile while I'm at it. It's being threatened, you know. Going is about to become a real Catch 22 situation. The thoughts all bubble together and drudge each other up when i'm like this. I can't find any respite with my guitar, I just get frustrated. I can't drink every night because I don't want to be an alcoholic like every other Dad I've had. I won't share any of the other details. And really, I think I just want the comfort of a lady friend. Preferably someone who challenges me. I'd forgotten what that was like until recently.
I really miss my close family. My sister, brother-in-law and nephew moved to Berkeley, CA in February. My sister and I are very close. Best friends in the whole world. Sis came to town a couple weeks ago and it just got me missing them more. I'm missing my nephew growing up. I'll be in Berkeley for Labor Day weekend, Thanksgiving and we'll be together for Christmas in Bend. It's just not the same as living across the street from each other. *sigh*
Devo is living in Northern New York, he's my brother-in-law's best friend and pretty much a part of the family. We play some pretty damaged music together, highly inspired by binge drinking and watching Lost in Translation. It's the common activities that keep us together, yo. He'll be back in October for the winter and we'll get to drive up the mountain. He'll snowboard and I'll play Unreal Tournament in the lodge, or I'll do my homework-- novel concept.
I've also been feeling that some of my friends need my attention too much, and others don't seem to need me at all. There are some people I want to get to know better, but it seems like I have people standing in my way. I just want to have some kind of balance. I need to have a little more fun, and lord knows I'm trying.
I was thinking about looking for a girlfriend, but they never solve problems. They just help you gloss over your problems until they become a problem themselves. I'm not much into dating. The whole mating ritual, small talk crap, makes me sick. It's a hell of a paradox loop, eh? I don't even think I'd remember what to do if I had a nice lady friend. Do people still go to the movies?
There's this thing I do, this activity.. The people there always help me to get my mind off these things. I never fail to smile while I'm at it. It's being threatened, you know. Going is about to become a real Catch 22 situation. The thoughts all bubble together and drudge each other up when i'm like this. I can't find any respite with my guitar, I just get frustrated. I can't drink every night because I don't want to be an alcoholic like every other Dad I've had. I won't share any of the other details. And really, I think I just want the comfort of a lady friend. Preferably someone who challenges me. I'd forgotten what that was like until recently.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
I really wish someone would just make me a librarian and be done with it.
[Edited on Aug 18, 2004 10:50PM]