Everything I Need To Know About Life I Learned From "Saved By The Bell"
1. Drugs are bad, mmmkay. I learned long ago that if I want to be valedictorian AND get my all girl singing group off the ground, I would need drugs. It would be the only way to handle all the studying AND rehearsals. I mean, I'd have to learn the periodic table for Chemistry on top of all of the words to "I'm So Excited". That's too much to do without a little speed. But as we learned at the end of that episode, if you take speed, you sleep through your finals and miss the audition. So drugs are not the answer. Instead, you need to choose between studying or performing. So kids, ignore school, and work on your lipsyncing routines to popular disco tracks. Take it from Jesse Spano. You too can be in Showgirls.
2. Even if you don't move your feet, you can still be a good dancer. Make sure you move your arms a LOT and sway to the music. Don't worry about moving, because no one else is. You won't get run into. Now, listen for the beat. You hear that? Try to make your swaying match the beat. Don't worry if it's not perfect, just smile and look to someone who has it down and say to them, "Gee, you dance great!" They'll be obliged to return the compliment. It's just that easy.
3. If it's not the size of a shoebox, it's not a real cellphone. Don't believe the guy at Cellular One who tries to persuade you to get the Nokia 3463 TeenyFone. They just want you to get it, loose it, and then have to drop a couple hundred on another one. Get the Zack Morris Manly Man's Cellphone. It's big, it's grey, you can't loose it, and in a pinch, you can use it to stop the stone door from trapping you inside the Temple of Doom.
4. If you're going to lie to your parents/principal/teachers/other students, make sure you tell them all the SAME story. Nothing ruins your fun of selling "buddy bands " or wrecking Lisa's mom's Mercedes after a toga party like having to come clean about it all. Think of a simple, believable lie. Add as much truth to it as you can. If it looks like anyone won't be able to handle the lie, (Screech) take care of them. No sense in getting detention if you can just let Samuel sleep with the fishes.
1. Drugs are bad, mmmkay. I learned long ago that if I want to be valedictorian AND get my all girl singing group off the ground, I would need drugs. It would be the only way to handle all the studying AND rehearsals. I mean, I'd have to learn the periodic table for Chemistry on top of all of the words to "I'm So Excited". That's too much to do without a little speed. But as we learned at the end of that episode, if you take speed, you sleep through your finals and miss the audition. So drugs are not the answer. Instead, you need to choose between studying or performing. So kids, ignore school, and work on your lipsyncing routines to popular disco tracks. Take it from Jesse Spano. You too can be in Showgirls.
2. Even if you don't move your feet, you can still be a good dancer. Make sure you move your arms a LOT and sway to the music. Don't worry about moving, because no one else is. You won't get run into. Now, listen for the beat. You hear that? Try to make your swaying match the beat. Don't worry if it's not perfect, just smile and look to someone who has it down and say to them, "Gee, you dance great!" They'll be obliged to return the compliment. It's just that easy.
3. If it's not the size of a shoebox, it's not a real cellphone. Don't believe the guy at Cellular One who tries to persuade you to get the Nokia 3463 TeenyFone. They just want you to get it, loose it, and then have to drop a couple hundred on another one. Get the Zack Morris Manly Man's Cellphone. It's big, it's grey, you can't loose it, and in a pinch, you can use it to stop the stone door from trapping you inside the Temple of Doom.
4. If you're going to lie to your parents/principal/teachers/other students, make sure you tell them all the SAME story. Nothing ruins your fun of selling "buddy bands " or wrecking Lisa's mom's Mercedes after a toga party like having to come clean about it all. Think of a simple, believable lie. Add as much truth to it as you can. If it looks like anyone won't be able to handle the lie, (Screech) take care of them. No sense in getting detention if you can just let Samuel sleep with the fishes.
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i wish you could have told my throat that a week ago! hehe