You know I would prefer coffee and a smoke.......and I don't even like either of those.
This whole "early morning argument" bullshit is beyond tired. At what point do you decide that giving someone a second chance really wasn't worth it? Do they have to step on your toes once, twice, ten times? The missus and I find ourselves having the same arguments we've had for a decade, only now they're less intense. I suspect that's really only because we're still a bit gun shy about cutting loose, what with the big seperation only 5 or 6 months behind us.
Still the arguments don't just disappear because you decide you want them to, it takes time and effort. Ah yes magical words those. I think 12 years is more than enough time by far. As far as effort goes, well, that's what this morning "grand debate" was all about. How do you make something work with someone who refuses to put forth an effort? All about the instant gratification she is quick to complain (and at length) but very slow to actually work at it. We've had an ongoing debate for years over how this should work, but apparently I'm to believe my job is to pay the bills, make the friends, keep track of the old ones, and make sure that she gets what she wants while I settle for whatever I can get. Her job is to just kick back and enjoy my efforts.
You might imagine that takes a toll on a person after awhile eh?
And sad bat true dear friends she admitted to me that our "miraculous reconciliation" had mostly to do with the fact that I finally told her to piss off for good and lose my number last fall and she was afraid to be out of work, living with roomates she wasn't sure she liked. Oh and oh yeah, she loves me too. No really. Riiiiiiiiight.............
So you say, "Why don't you two seek professional help". Funny thing, I've been asking her to do that with me for YEARS now and even after everything we've been through she still gets upset at the very notion.
See this is why falling in love with someone honestly and truly sucks. This girl was the apple of my eye since I was 13 and a freshman in High School. I knew right where my future was from day one. Now I'm a bit older than that and have invested just about 2 decades into relationship with her and realize that this is as good as it gets for this relationship. I know I can do better. Second chances became third chances, became impossible to keep track of and now I have to have enough dignity and self-respect to say "Don't let the door hit you on the way out". Again. And stick to it.
If she proves me wrong in the next few days, you'll be the first to know about it.
Blah, blah, blah
Hades
This whole "early morning argument" bullshit is beyond tired. At what point do you decide that giving someone a second chance really wasn't worth it? Do they have to step on your toes once, twice, ten times? The missus and I find ourselves having the same arguments we've had for a decade, only now they're less intense. I suspect that's really only because we're still a bit gun shy about cutting loose, what with the big seperation only 5 or 6 months behind us.
Still the arguments don't just disappear because you decide you want them to, it takes time and effort. Ah yes magical words those. I think 12 years is more than enough time by far. As far as effort goes, well, that's what this morning "grand debate" was all about. How do you make something work with someone who refuses to put forth an effort? All about the instant gratification she is quick to complain (and at length) but very slow to actually work at it. We've had an ongoing debate for years over how this should work, but apparently I'm to believe my job is to pay the bills, make the friends, keep track of the old ones, and make sure that she gets what she wants while I settle for whatever I can get. Her job is to just kick back and enjoy my efforts.
You might imagine that takes a toll on a person after awhile eh?
And sad bat true dear friends she admitted to me that our "miraculous reconciliation" had mostly to do with the fact that I finally told her to piss off for good and lose my number last fall and she was afraid to be out of work, living with roomates she wasn't sure she liked. Oh and oh yeah, she loves me too. No really. Riiiiiiiiight.............
So you say, "Why don't you two seek professional help". Funny thing, I've been asking her to do that with me for YEARS now and even after everything we've been through she still gets upset at the very notion.
See this is why falling in love with someone honestly and truly sucks. This girl was the apple of my eye since I was 13 and a freshman in High School. I knew right where my future was from day one. Now I'm a bit older than that and have invested just about 2 decades into relationship with her and realize that this is as good as it gets for this relationship. I know I can do better. Second chances became third chances, became impossible to keep track of and now I have to have enough dignity and self-respect to say "Don't let the door hit you on the way out". Again. And stick to it.
If she proves me wrong in the next few days, you'll be the first to know about it.
Blah, blah, blah
Hades

I'm in a similar boat re: a loooong term relationship and it doesn't work if you only want it to work or even want to make it work.
You HAVE to want to want to make it work and even when the past remains unresolved, always look foreward to your future together.