lesson #3300891:
Without dialogue, in silence, time pushes this huge amount of distance between two and allows for assumptions to take over. one starts to allow his/her own assumptions/projections to colour their view of the other rather than actually allowing the other's answers to his/her proposed questions to feed the Truth. one tries not to let paranoia take over in the midst of all this vast silence but, if not quite paranoia, then many other negative and lonely feelings come washing in. little does one know that the other is full of something large and vibrant for the other, not less, but rather more. but what does it all matter when time and distance are granted the power to spread like dark, opaque ink over the open space that could have helped but did not. all the time and effort put into working independantly of the other about the unity that was originally created in unison ends up channelled towards nothing more than a demise to the possibilities... and Time becomes this evil fucking thing that brings everything that is alive closer to demise. vague fucking vague noemi... dark fucking dark... but hey...
this is why I smoke weed at night. to shut this mind factory down for a while. otherwise psychosis would creep in. either that or deep depression. but i am up and down up and down (depression is but a mere flicker in the bulb, though - I won't allow it to be more than that) - perpetual quest for balance. it's tiring. really it is.
sorry for the darkness if anyone other than me is actually reading this (why would you?). the darkness creates itself. I'm just narrating it. oooh... that's even more dark. shit. i'm really not this dark all the time - again, just a flicker in the bulb. I just really miss the man i love. I'm going to take Sy out to the park now. turn the light back on.
Without dialogue, in silence, time pushes this huge amount of distance between two and allows for assumptions to take over. one starts to allow his/her own assumptions/projections to colour their view of the other rather than actually allowing the other's answers to his/her proposed questions to feed the Truth. one tries not to let paranoia take over in the midst of all this vast silence but, if not quite paranoia, then many other negative and lonely feelings come washing in. little does one know that the other is full of something large and vibrant for the other, not less, but rather more. but what does it all matter when time and distance are granted the power to spread like dark, opaque ink over the open space that could have helped but did not. all the time and effort put into working independantly of the other about the unity that was originally created in unison ends up channelled towards nothing more than a demise to the possibilities... and Time becomes this evil fucking thing that brings everything that is alive closer to demise. vague fucking vague noemi... dark fucking dark... but hey...
this is why I smoke weed at night. to shut this mind factory down for a while. otherwise psychosis would creep in. either that or deep depression. but i am up and down up and down (depression is but a mere flicker in the bulb, though - I won't allow it to be more than that) - perpetual quest for balance. it's tiring. really it is.
sorry for the darkness if anyone other than me is actually reading this (why would you?). the darkness creates itself. I'm just narrating it. oooh... that's even more dark. shit. i'm really not this dark all the time - again, just a flicker in the bulb. I just really miss the man i love. I'm going to take Sy out to the park now. turn the light back on.
Welcome to the single parents group.