gundamfury

Right now, I am feeling lonely as hell. I feel as though there is no one I can talk to. I want to talk about any and everything.... and at the same time, nothing. I miss the sordid art of hanging-out.... chillin'.... talking to people one-on-one. For some reason, it just bothers me so much that I don't talk to most anyone outside of work that much anymore. Although talking to people at work isn't that great because I usually get derided for one reason or another. I think the reason I miss being with Jen so much is because I almost always had someone to talk to. I don't think most of our conversations went in the directions I would like to lead them, but I was able to talk. I miss that constant personal connection.

Tears are salty

I decided the other day that I am gonna have to go through a very selfish time for a few months. I have not really taken as good of care of myself as I should have. Sure, I have eaten lots of food, and done some stuff, this and that. But I have not fulfilled much-of-any of the promises I have made to myself. I always have been trying to take care of someone else. I know that I have tried to do for myself before, but it didn't pan out too well. There is so much shit that I want to do/need to do... for me. I'm gonna have to be selfish if I'm to get somewhat ahead in life.

I'm too emotional, but I can't help it.

The first order of business is to take care of a few bills, and financial standings. After that I must get a new tattoo. Then to fixings of my car and saving for Otakon. I hope that if I do good at my interview, and get the job at WSFS, that I'll still be able to go. I really need it now. I need to do something good and fun for myself.

Don't mind me, I'm slightly fractured. I'll get over it. I can walk with a broken leg as long as I am strong enough to believe I can.