guitargeek

On Torque Wrenches...

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With A Little Help From My Friends

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Paying It Forward

So I was bitching about my torque wrench recently, right? I'd planned to use Action Man's clicker when reassembling my engine, but he inexplicably turned into a douche bag so that was no longer an option.

I rooted around in my dad's tools and came up with this antique split beam torque wrench.



I'd only ever used a modern clicker torque wrench, so I had to do some research on how best to use a beam-type. Turns out the split beam is generally more accurate than a clicker and never needs calibration, but it's more difficult to use correctly, it's really sort of an art form. You have to be able to have the wrench exactly perpendicular to the fastener and have to be able to see the dial indicator very clearly. You swing the wrench smoothly to the torque rating you're going for, then let off immediately because if you hold it there then it's still going to keep applying force and will overtorque the fastener, because it's a big leaf spring.

I hit up my buddy, Kevan, and asked him his opinions on torque wrenches. He's an inventor and a bit of a gear head, used to be a service department manager working on extremely expensive and precisely engineered motion picture equipment, so he knows about tools. He recommended getting a clicker, of course, but understands that I'm extremely limited in my resources (invalid shut in just don't pay).

A week goes by and I get this box in the mail...









I was just floored.

This is the same guy who bought me a ticket to go see Tom Waits recently!

I had to explain to my dad that Kevan isn't queer for me, hahaha! I helped Kevan invent something a few years ago, and I guess he appreciates having me around as a sounding board for his ideas. He'll float something my way and I'll shoot holes in it and make suggestions, and I guess it helps give him perspective or something. Two heads are better than one and all that. I don't know how much he makes off this invention, but I'm sure they've sold tens of thousands of units by now.

I should also mention that Kevan was one of my first internet friends, and the one I've known the longest, over ten years. I've never met him in person, but I did build him one hell of a custom guitar back in the 90s (I'll try to find pics).

Kevan drives a Dodge Ram SRT-10, it's the pickup truck with the V10 Viper motor. 500hp burnout king. He spends most of his time thinking up little performance doodads for the truck, then having them manufactured. I give him a lot of shit about gas mileage.

Over the years I've worked and hammered on him, gotten him to where he plays through tube amps and doesn't hate and fear motorcycles. He admires Valentino Rossi (come on, who wouldn't?) and has developed an appreciation for the engineering that goes into bikes, especially the Italian stuff (come on, who wouldn't?) He still refuses to accept that Dodge Tomahawk won't work. He travels to a lot of music industry trade shows (like NAMM), hangs out with rock stars and guitar factory reps and the like.

He's a regular mensch, he is.



No, they're not the best torque wrenches you can buy, Kevan spent more to send me to see Tom Waits, but I think these are perfectly adequate and infinitely better than the clicker torque wrenches I didn't have before!

It can be a little tough sometimes to swallow one's pride and accept help and gifts from friends, but it's hard to argue against when people not only tell you but show you that they believe in what you're doing and want to help out. Two people on a motorcycle forum got together behind my back and bought me a new clutch when mine was going out a couple years back. Another one bought my tag and insurance a few years ago because I was broke and he wanted me to enjoy my bike. He said it was cheaper and better than going to a shrink, and he was right. Hell, my last two SG subscriptions were gifted me by the mysteriously zotted panda and the exotic jet set gigalo, SaintGutFree (I helped him pick out his car!)

This is why I take the time to answer people's questions about how to service and operate their bike or guitar or amplifier or whatever. Sometimes it gets thrown back in my face (a friend of mine says, "The worst insult you can give someone is good advice.") but it's generally pretty rewarding when I can help somebody along and sometimes there's an unexpected windfall!