Melancholy today
Ive been feeling pretty selfish lately. For example, the tattoo. I fucking love it, right? So Im showing it off to my best friend last night, and she is trying her best to be excited for me but I can tell theres something there. She is pretty conservative. But I am the matron of honor in her wedding this summer, and the gowns are strapless and I realize that I have now put her in an awkward position to have to ask me to cover it up (if I can even do that - its so colorful). Im pretty bummed out that I didnt even consider this factor.
Its not just that though I guess all my life I have been so eager to please, and have always gone over and above trying to make other people happy. Of course you all know that its really impossible to please everyone else, so Ive had a lot of disappointment and heartbreak. In what I believe is a direct reaction to that, Ive recently discovered how to make myself happy and I feel like it has made me quite narcissistic and demanding. And it also hurts those around me. Ive made commitments to people and fallen short.
I dont have moments like this too often, either. Sadly, I am not introspective. I just go about my day being insanely happy (I am a very happy person), obviously because Im just being inconsiderate. Right?
Ive been feeling pretty selfish lately. For example, the tattoo. I fucking love it, right? So Im showing it off to my best friend last night, and she is trying her best to be excited for me but I can tell theres something there. She is pretty conservative. But I am the matron of honor in her wedding this summer, and the gowns are strapless and I realize that I have now put her in an awkward position to have to ask me to cover it up (if I can even do that - its so colorful). Im pretty bummed out that I didnt even consider this factor.
Its not just that though I guess all my life I have been so eager to please, and have always gone over and above trying to make other people happy. Of course you all know that its really impossible to please everyone else, so Ive had a lot of disappointment and heartbreak. In what I believe is a direct reaction to that, Ive recently discovered how to make myself happy and I feel like it has made me quite narcissistic and demanding. And it also hurts those around me. Ive made commitments to people and fallen short.
I dont have moments like this too often, either. Sadly, I am not introspective. I just go about my day being insanely happy (I am a very happy person), obviously because Im just being inconsiderate. Right?
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maybe that's your problem, but i couldn't say for sure.
If you've been busy trying to please everyone
else you have neglected yourself. So you went
a little overboard making yourself happy, now
just temper it a little and then you can keep
the masses happy without forgetting you