I love my wife...
While I'm sitting in the den, reorganizing my craft supplies, she's on the couch shouting, "I fucking hate Brent Musburger! That cocksucker has no right to announce this game..."

While I'm sitting in the den, reorganizing my craft supplies, she's on the couch shouting, "I fucking hate Brent Musburger! That cocksucker has no right to announce this game..."

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I fear that you are correct. The dorkiness will never be exorcised from my journal. The best I can do is cover it up with different kinds of dorkiness. Oh well.
Would a gift JD be any good, really? Seems like it'd just be that much more suffering to be expected to do a lawyer's work without having toiled for the degree. On the other hand, free bragging rights without the pain... hmm...