grayblue

disclaimer - unabashed honesty to come.

I need to get laid. but i've finally gotten to the point in my life where i don't want to fuck someone simply because i can. i had three years of that... a lot of that. and i'm done with it. when i moved to NYC i made some very concious and sobering decisions to change behaviors, and i have.
I've done a hell of a job at it. and honestly, i'm beginning to think too good of a job at it.
it's been almost two months at this point. which makes about the longest stretch i've had in close to five years. and i'm not saying it's a bad thing, i could certainly use the time to be okay with being alone... blah blah blah.
you know what, strike all of that. it's not to get laid that i want, it's just some closeness. some human contact. the vast majority of my friends here are people from work, and while we end up spending quite a bit of time together, there's not a particular closeness as i've been accustomed to. it's not like we're going to greet each other with hugs. THAT i could use.
blah blah blah, whine whine whine. whatever. i can complain all i want, that certainly won't change things.
maybe i really do just need to get laid.