gramn

my soul,
do not aspire
immortally;
but . . .
attain to
the limits
of possibility.

-Pindar

There is but one truly
serious philosophical
problem, and that is suicide . . .

-A. Camus

friday night.
it's been hot out like it's suppossed to be. but it's supposed to cool down over the next few days.

i went walking to the shopping center today. It's about 40 minutes each way.
a pleasant walk. i listen to music. fairly level.
i got some groceries; put them in my backpack.

there's not alot happening now.
i've been watching more television.
i've...
Read More

sunday night now.
it was hot out today, like summer ought to be.

so, i didn't do alot today.
we got a ride to go grocery shopping.
i am sorting out plans in my mind, still.

it seems like there are alot of possibilities.
i've been sleeping too much recently.
i was a little restless today, but the day got better later.
i'm going to...
Read More

so, another day.
it finally seems sunnier and warmer, at the end of april.

not doing a lot these days.
we were in court earlier today.
it seemed to go relatively well.

i figured out to adjust my meds, recently.
so the dysphoria has not resumed since then.
i wish i had figured that out sooner. i've been through so much misery the last couple...
Read More

saturday tonight.
was sick again for several hours.
then it eased up about an hour ago. i'm hoping this will stop eventually, or diminish.
it was gone for most of the week, then just recently it started again.
unpredictable.

so, we've been getting used to not having a car.
it's not as bad as it could have been. the bus runs through here on the...
Read More

so, another day.
may is supposed to be summer i think.
but it's been cool here for a few weeks now.

we didn't go to the carnival.
the rental car is gone now. so we have no car now.
maybe another year.

so, now i'm waiting to go to graduate school.
i'm optimistic the financial aid will go through.
i guess i need to make...
Read More

so, an interesting day.

things seem to be getting better now.
it looks like we have enough money to get to the start of graduate school.
then, the financial aid should be available from there.
this is the best things have been in several months.
the financial aid though is still not certain.
i guess it will take a few weeks for that to process...
Read More

late now again.
an end to a long day.

i was sick most of the day again. very troubling.
i hope things get better now. they seem to get a little better as time goes on.

we only have the rental car until wednesday. then we have to figure how to get by without a car.

re-reading the fall now. it seems interesting still.
i...
Read More

late night again.

it was a nice day today. overcast all day though.
the carnival is in town, but i don't want to go until it is warmer.
they seem to come by once a year.

i was re-admitted to stanford. if the financial aid works out i'll be going for the summer term in june.
it may be i'll take photography or fiction writing...
Read More

so, another day.

didn't do very much today.
earlier we went to see the wrecked car. it looks like a total loss. i removed all of our belongings from it.
the insurance company has not yet looked at it.
i had the car since '94, until i gave it to my wife. it is sad to see it wrecked now.

so, nearing the end of...
Read More

almost midnight now. the 14th.
almost tax day.

well, our remaining car is in the shop. they said it may be a total loss.
we're in a rental right now. i don't know how we'd manage to get another car.
i hope they can repair this one.

an old girlfriend called. i had sought to add her on facebook; she added me and found my...
Read More

so, the 12th now.
it's been kind of cold the last few days.
i'm re-reading the fall now. i just finished re-reading it a few weeks ago, but had trouble thinking about what he was saying; camus.
i re-read the stranger a few months ago and understood it quite a lot better than when i read it twenty years ago or so. no need to...
Read More