Friday morning... I was pretty upset. With everyone being sick I have missed the last week and a half of school. It's the end of the semester so I've got papers and projects galore. Wednesday, the one day I managed to get to school, I showed up to my Sociology class to discover we had a test which I was totally unprepared for. This has been very hard for me. Not simply because it's going to hurt my grades, my GPA, and my chances of getting into grad school. But also because I've worked my ass off to get here. I struggled for 8 years while working full-time, being a single mom, and dealing with all kinds of other personal struggles to get here. To Northridge, California. To go to CSUN. To be in the Deaf Studies program. And now, in just a few short weeks, I feel like I'm watching it all go down the toilet. And I'm not happy. I've sacrificed a lot to be here and it's put a serious burden on my family, my finances, and my marriage, and for what? So I could totally fuck it up.
My relationship with my husband has been scraping bottom for months now. Which is depressing him. Which is making his job very difficult. Which is making us very poor.
So, of course, it takes a near tragedy to put things into perspective.
In the midst of me wanting to fucking kill everything on Friday morning my four year-old.... vomits blood. Let's just say this freaked me out a bit. I couldn't get a hold of her dr. so I took her to the ER. We sat in the ER from 9:45 until 4:00. I sat there and watched my baby with a tube in one are and a needle in the other. Prayed that she would sleep through the screaming crazies and the violently loud vomitting going on in the other rooms. Listened to her beg me to take her home over and over again.
At 4:00 they strapped us both onto a stretcher and loaded us into an ambulance. She was being transferred to another hospital to be admitted.
The room in the pediatric wing was very nice. Big room all to ourselves. Murals on the wall. A couple flat screen TVs up on the wall. Elizabeth was happy to have her very own remote. She seemed to be doing a bit better. She was alert and talking.
She slept in her bed that she could make go up and down. I slept in the chair next to her.
Saturday morning, Phil had to pass up a huge opportunity handed to him from the VP of North American Honda. It just about killed him and he tried everything he could not to miss it. But there was no one to watch the baby and Elizabeth and I had no way home from the hospital. My car was still in the parking lot of the first hospital. A big part of our problems lately have been that his work comes before everything else. And his schedule is hard to work with. Him staying home, was a huge deal.
It turns out Elizabeth had contracted the same virus I had. Apparantly, with this kind of virus, that's somewhat rare. So aren't we special. She got so sick and dehydrated that her sugar levels dropped dangerously low. As did some other things having to with liver functions and other seiousness. The bleeding was most likely caused by a tear in the esophogus or stomach from the sheer force and frequency of her vomitting. After 24 hours of IV fluids she was doing much better. They let us come home Saturday afternoon.
I haven't been so happy to see her smile, sleep in her own room, or have a sip of juice since she was a baby. I have a much better perspective of the way things are now. Phil and I seem to have a renewed respect for each other which I'm grateful for. He's back at work today and Elizabeth is playing outside. It's almost like nothing happened, except nothing is the same. I'm still thinking through everything and renegotiating my priorities. But this I know, we're going to be ok.
My relationship with my husband has been scraping bottom for months now. Which is depressing him. Which is making his job very difficult. Which is making us very poor.
So, of course, it takes a near tragedy to put things into perspective.
In the midst of me wanting to fucking kill everything on Friday morning my four year-old.... vomits blood. Let's just say this freaked me out a bit. I couldn't get a hold of her dr. so I took her to the ER. We sat in the ER from 9:45 until 4:00. I sat there and watched my baby with a tube in one are and a needle in the other. Prayed that she would sleep through the screaming crazies and the violently loud vomitting going on in the other rooms. Listened to her beg me to take her home over and over again.
At 4:00 they strapped us both onto a stretcher and loaded us into an ambulance. She was being transferred to another hospital to be admitted.
The room in the pediatric wing was very nice. Big room all to ourselves. Murals on the wall. A couple flat screen TVs up on the wall. Elizabeth was happy to have her very own remote. She seemed to be doing a bit better. She was alert and talking.
She slept in her bed that she could make go up and down. I slept in the chair next to her.
Saturday morning, Phil had to pass up a huge opportunity handed to him from the VP of North American Honda. It just about killed him and he tried everything he could not to miss it. But there was no one to watch the baby and Elizabeth and I had no way home from the hospital. My car was still in the parking lot of the first hospital. A big part of our problems lately have been that his work comes before everything else. And his schedule is hard to work with. Him staying home, was a huge deal.
It turns out Elizabeth had contracted the same virus I had. Apparantly, with this kind of virus, that's somewhat rare. So aren't we special. She got so sick and dehydrated that her sugar levels dropped dangerously low. As did some other things having to with liver functions and other seiousness. The bleeding was most likely caused by a tear in the esophogus or stomach from the sheer force and frequency of her vomitting. After 24 hours of IV fluids she was doing much better. They let us come home Saturday afternoon.
I haven't been so happy to see her smile, sleep in her own room, or have a sip of juice since she was a baby. I have a much better perspective of the way things are now. Phil and I seem to have a renewed respect for each other which I'm grateful for. He's back at work today and Elizabeth is playing outside. It's almost like nothing happened, except nothing is the same. I'm still thinking through everything and renegotiating my priorities. But this I know, we're going to be ok.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
shawndaddy:
I'm glad to see she's doing ok now 
wunnspeed:
Damn! I go away for a couple of days... Glad everything worked out o.k. That had to be seriously traumatic.