gingersnaps_____

My ex, Steven, just sent me these song lyrics by some guy called Jack Johnson and if they aren't about me and him I don't know what is! He then did the heartless thing of pasting "Learning loving somebody, Dont make them love you". Why doesn't he just put my heart in a microwave now he's ripped it out!? He's referring to the fact that I still love him, for anyone who doesnt know. And no, these lyrics aren't just an accident. He admitted that he send them because they're 'meaningful'...


I was sitting, waiting, wishing
You believed in superstitions (I'm wiccan and believe in silly things like that)
Then maybe you would see the signs
But lord knows that this world is cruel
And I aint the lord no Im just a fool
Learning loving somebody (Yeah, we'll leave
Dont make them love you this bit I think...)
Must I always be waiting, waiting on you? (I still love him as much as the day i met him 5 yrs ago)
Must I always be playing, playing your fool?

I sang your songs I danced your dance (I used to love dance music, he hated it. He converted me lol)
I gave your friends all a chance (Him and my best mate Sara can't stand each other)
But putting up with them
Wasnt worth never having you
Maybe youve been through this before
But its my first time so please ignore (We were both each others firsts)
The next few lines because theyre directed at you
I cant always be waiting, waiting on you
I cant always be playing, playing your fool

I keep playing your part
But its not my scene (He doesn't like going out to clubs etc, I do)
Want this plot to twist
Ive had enough mystery
You keep building it up
But then youre shooting me down
But Im already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting, waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting, waiting

Well if I was in your position
Id put down all my ammunition
Id wonder why it had taken me so long
But lord knows that Im not you
And if I was I wouldnt be so cruel
Because waiting on love (Yep, I'm still clinging to the thought that he'l be the guy waiting at the end of the isle for me and who'd be the father of my kids.... sad I know)
Aint so easy to do
Must I always be waiting, waiting on you?
Must I always be playing, playing your fool?

I hate men I feel totally back to sqaure one again now. Why does he have to hate me so much!? Why can't he just love me?! Am I really such a bad person? Am I really that nasty? Am I realy such a fat ugly cow that he can't stand to look at me never mind love me and hug me n kiss me like he used to?
I feel sick.... I need to throw up....