ginacherry

The actions of my youth will haunt me forever more and to turn away from those things, I would be making a huge mistake,.......you see all that I am looking for is an outlet someone to entertain me for something that I have never had, someone that I could hold in my arms for a few night s and know once and for all what it is like to be wanted, to be held, to be given something more than the feeling that you are just a hole.......this boy you see, he was the one, he was going to finally make love to me.....though I am a slut 100 times over and with pride I have to say, I am a virgin when it comes to making love.,......I think maybe it is all a myth, something that does and has never existed, at least not for the likes of me.......I sit here.....those eyes never leave me and for the moment I am lost in all that is not to be......I think about it all the time, ....how do we continue parting the things over and over again.....the most intimate parts of what we are and our identity with strangers, lovers, friends, the enemies we have made and not loose our sanity....I am broken, fractured 1000 times over and the imperfections are evident even to the untrained eye........for I know that when you finally enter me....when that sweet smile and those soft lips touch this brown skin, part of me will be at rest......so come closer I say....let me straddle you and adore your loving face once more before you leave me....let my tits rest up against the warmth of your chest, shoulder, your chin nuzziling my neck.....the smell I carry is intoxicatiing and one day when you are alone...and it has been years since we spoke, the familiar scent of that vanilla will make your eyes well up with the memory of our encounter......back to your amrs embracing my back....your hair in my hands....and how I nibbled on your ear....moaning gently the things we so long ago thought to say....then everything that I knew I wanted....everything that I new I could have will have finally passed in the empty chamber of this heart that woudl have passed so long ago and in it's absence I will haunt your memory of the night we were to make love ......the night I was to be yours once and for all......these ghosts keep laying claim to my sanity....they will keep laying claim to your curiosity and even your love..........don't be afraid of how far we can go.......just be afraid of not ever going far enough...........