"Well, I've successfully managed to stay off drink since the incident and with that found myself settling into my cosy nights instead of trying to get drunk every night. Then I got bored of that and started replacing it with other things such as weed, pills, coke, and laughing gas.
One by one I've tried weaning myself off again, reminding myself that it is a stupid idea to replace one vice with an immediate other which could prove potentially harmful. During that time, my love pursuit has been lapse (thankfully) and I haven't thought about it until this week when it occurred to me that if I am to spend the next few years off drink and trying to establish some sort of film production, it'd be cool to do it with someone else.
However I can't really get around to doing that what with a lapse in confidence (due to know booze - it sounds bad I know - or chemical stimulation). On that note however, I'm trying not to think about it by working on new ideas for artwork which I plan to just go and create instead of waiting for. It's easier said than done unfortunately, however it NEEDS to be done in order to preserve my sanity and enthusiasm for my own sense of creativity, because lord knows the course so far is doing nothing for me"
* I can't drink as over Christmas I was diagnosed with pancreatitus. One more drink anytime soon and I could simply die. So I don't think I'll be doing that anytime soon
One by one I've tried weaning myself off again, reminding myself that it is a stupid idea to replace one vice with an immediate other which could prove potentially harmful. During that time, my love pursuit has been lapse (thankfully) and I haven't thought about it until this week when it occurred to me that if I am to spend the next few years off drink and trying to establish some sort of film production, it'd be cool to do it with someone else.
However I can't really get around to doing that what with a lapse in confidence (due to know booze - it sounds bad I know - or chemical stimulation). On that note however, I'm trying not to think about it by working on new ideas for artwork which I plan to just go and create instead of waiting for. It's easier said than done unfortunately, however it NEEDS to be done in order to preserve my sanity and enthusiasm for my own sense of creativity, because lord knows the course so far is doing nothing for me"
* I can't drink as over Christmas I was diagnosed with pancreatitus. One more drink anytime soon and I could simply die. So I don't think I'll be doing that anytime soon