I dont remember the last time I was this close to crying.
Im at that point where Im taking a step back, assessing my life, and asking myself what the fuck is going on.
Mainly with my relationships.
I used to think I was just meeting all the wrong people, but now Im starting to doubt myself.
After going so long without someone, you cant help but think that its your own fault.
I meet guy after guy after guy, and it never works out.
What am I doing wrong? Why dont they like me? Arent my jokes funny? Am I not pretty enough?
All these things just claw at my brain. Theyre eating away at me.
I was never ever EVER the kind of girl that needed somebody else to make her happy.
And I dont think Im looking for somebody to make me feel better about myself as a person, but theres always that one little extra part of you that you cant fix by yourself.
I know in my heart of hearts that Im a good person. Im not the best looking girl on Earth, I know that, but I wouldnt want to be with somebody who was that shallow any way.
I dont even really know where Im going with this. I guess its just all building up inside of me.
Seeing my friends all have significant others, being alone on the holidays, especially for New Years..
It just makes me... sad... theres not other way to put it really.
And not only that, Ive been forced to see whats really important to my friends.
Ive seriously kind of felt like a few of them have pushed me aside for bigger and, what they think, are better things.
*Sigh*
Who wants to cuddle?
Im at that point where Im taking a step back, assessing my life, and asking myself what the fuck is going on.
Mainly with my relationships.
I used to think I was just meeting all the wrong people, but now Im starting to doubt myself.
After going so long without someone, you cant help but think that its your own fault.
I meet guy after guy after guy, and it never works out.
What am I doing wrong? Why dont they like me? Arent my jokes funny? Am I not pretty enough?
All these things just claw at my brain. Theyre eating away at me.
I was never ever EVER the kind of girl that needed somebody else to make her happy.
And I dont think Im looking for somebody to make me feel better about myself as a person, but theres always that one little extra part of you that you cant fix by yourself.
I know in my heart of hearts that Im a good person. Im not the best looking girl on Earth, I know that, but I wouldnt want to be with somebody who was that shallow any way.
I dont even really know where Im going with this. I guess its just all building up inside of me.
Seeing my friends all have significant others, being alone on the holidays, especially for New Years..
It just makes me... sad... theres not other way to put it really.
And not only that, Ive been forced to see whats really important to my friends.
Ive seriously kind of felt like a few of them have pushed me aside for bigger and, what they think, are better things.
*Sigh*
Who wants to cuddle?
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
i miss my mels...
seriously
I miss you so much...i've come close to crying numerous times....
can we please hang out and talk when you get back from MD?
these things are really difficult and take time to work themselves out. in all honesty you just haven't found someone who is compatible with you. however that being said, if you have labeled someone as "i could never go out with this person" - you need to really assess if that's genuine or if it's just something you're saying. it's also worth considering how you approach possible relationships - if you go into them with the idea that they're temporary or something then you're setting up for just that.
you will find someone someday - after all you're a pretty awesome girl...