ugh i'm bored.
well, good news...Justin and I keep getting bitees on freelance work. I have some orders i have to complete by the 11th...which should be no problem except the guys email isnt working properly and he cant approve my proofs!
oh well, i'll just have to do it and hope that its okay without his approval.
my boss has to get surgery soon and will be out for 2-3 weeks. what does that mean for me? well it means that i am going to have to take on full responsibility and will have to be working alot of overtime. over time is just peachy with me, i'm not looking forward to the long hours or the big headaches, but the paychecks will make me very happy. more money=closer and closer to financial stability. I've paid off two of my 3 credit cards. i have one card left to go, the new computer, and the rest of my car loan. I'm not even counting my student loans...those are far from paid off, but the monthly payments are low as they are all consolidated and are paid each month in a timely manner.
long term goals:
1. get monthly bills down to a minimum
2. take over a management position
3. increase freelance business
4. stop having nightmares about my parents and them ruining my life
4. figure my life the fuck out
pray for me
EDIT:
my mother was put in the hospital last night. od'ed on pills. my dad calls me up and says, "your mother's in west jeff she fucking ate a bunch of somas. we're getting a divorce." I started asking him what happened, who called the police, he hung up on me. I called the house back and my brother answers, i tell him, "let me warn you, if one more person in this family hangs up on me, i'm going to drive down there and put you all in the hospital." My brother tells me that my mom gets all stupid on the pills, not an uncommon theme in that household, and falls flat on her face. My dad picks up the phone and tells her he's going to call the police, trying to get her to respond, and he picks up the phone and dials 911, then hangs up. so the police show up, of course, and my mom is a blabbering lump and begins to yell at the police, "you cant take my drugs!" well, they can and they do and they load her up in an ambulance and take her to west jeff hospital.
my sister is handicapped. she's 25 years old, and my father cannot care for her because he is a male and she is a female and she has periods and needs to be bathed.
my dad says he's not goin up there but that i need to. I havent talked to my mother in about 2 weeks. i'm trying to remove myself from her insanity. but yet, i still get pulled back in.
I'm at work right now. exhausted because this all happened at about midnight or so last night. i'm exhausted due to lack of sleep. i'm exhausted because of my family.
i had nightmares all night last night. i dreamt i was living under a murderer. that the blood had seeped through his floor and was dripping from my ceiling. in my dream i'm taking care of my mom, my dad, my sister, my brother, lyric and justin, and now i have to save us all from a murderer. things in the apartment we are all crammed into start to fall apart and i cant lock the windows or doors to help protect us. at one point i'm letting the murderer sit down and have dinner with me so that the police may search his home, the whole time he's eating i'm praying that he doesnt look up and see the blood all over the ceiling. its just me and him and its my responsibilty to save the whole fucking world.
when will it stop?
well, good news...Justin and I keep getting bitees on freelance work. I have some orders i have to complete by the 11th...which should be no problem except the guys email isnt working properly and he cant approve my proofs!
oh well, i'll just have to do it and hope that its okay without his approval.
my boss has to get surgery soon and will be out for 2-3 weeks. what does that mean for me? well it means that i am going to have to take on full responsibility and will have to be working alot of overtime. over time is just peachy with me, i'm not looking forward to the long hours or the big headaches, but the paychecks will make me very happy. more money=closer and closer to financial stability. I've paid off two of my 3 credit cards. i have one card left to go, the new computer, and the rest of my car loan. I'm not even counting my student loans...those are far from paid off, but the monthly payments are low as they are all consolidated and are paid each month in a timely manner.
long term goals:
1. get monthly bills down to a minimum
2. take over a management position
3. increase freelance business
4. stop having nightmares about my parents and them ruining my life
4. figure my life the fuck out
pray for me
EDIT:
my mother was put in the hospital last night. od'ed on pills. my dad calls me up and says, "your mother's in west jeff she fucking ate a bunch of somas. we're getting a divorce." I started asking him what happened, who called the police, he hung up on me. I called the house back and my brother answers, i tell him, "let me warn you, if one more person in this family hangs up on me, i'm going to drive down there and put you all in the hospital." My brother tells me that my mom gets all stupid on the pills, not an uncommon theme in that household, and falls flat on her face. My dad picks up the phone and tells her he's going to call the police, trying to get her to respond, and he picks up the phone and dials 911, then hangs up. so the police show up, of course, and my mom is a blabbering lump and begins to yell at the police, "you cant take my drugs!" well, they can and they do and they load her up in an ambulance and take her to west jeff hospital.
my sister is handicapped. she's 25 years old, and my father cannot care for her because he is a male and she is a female and she has periods and needs to be bathed.
my dad says he's not goin up there but that i need to. I havent talked to my mother in about 2 weeks. i'm trying to remove myself from her insanity. but yet, i still get pulled back in.
I'm at work right now. exhausted because this all happened at about midnight or so last night. i'm exhausted due to lack of sleep. i'm exhausted because of my family.
i had nightmares all night last night. i dreamt i was living under a murderer. that the blood had seeped through his floor and was dripping from my ceiling. in my dream i'm taking care of my mom, my dad, my sister, my brother, lyric and justin, and now i have to save us all from a murderer. things in the apartment we are all crammed into start to fall apart and i cant lock the windows or doors to help protect us. at one point i'm letting the murderer sit down and have dinner with me so that the police may search his home, the whole time he's eating i'm praying that he doesnt look up and see the blood all over the ceiling. its just me and him and its my responsibilty to save the whole fucking world.
when will it stop?
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I will say that you are sexy lil devil