genevieve

Well i had to do it. I had to just swallow my pride and ask for help. I called his mother. Lyric's father's mother. The father that refuses to pay me child support and has basically forgotten his daughter.

He lives with his mother. she's very timid. Although sweet and, I believe for the most part, honest, very...well, sad. She had it rough with his father and its a sordid past and she's just a broken woman. She goes to work everyday, works in a bank. Has basically no social life. Has 5 enormous cats that she just basically lets have the run of the house. She can't even have company.

And i felt rotten. I do to some extent feel sorry for the fact, and i'm not being self righteous here, she has to be the mom to support a bad child. My mother has pride in me. To some extent. I have pride. This woman? Nothing to be proud of. But still a good, albeit weak, still a good human being.

I didnt want to ask her. But i was at my ropes end. I couldnt do anymore. One more day and there was nothing left to feed Lyric and Justin, my family. It was terrifying. I couldnt believe that i had gotten to a point of not being able to take care things. To need someone else's help. I had to ask his mother to borrow money. She abliged, whole heartedly, was just concerned with my family's welfare. I had in a way become pietistic, but I needed to be humbled. I see it. I'm paying attention. I understand what i needed to learn.

Thank you father.