I really really dont want the story of my life to be about this guy who worked at minimal jobs, did some things here and there and then died.
Am i SUPPOSED to do something great with these "talents" i have? Or are they like everyone elses talents... where my parents and friends have made them much bigger than they really are.
Perhaps my talents and abilities are great except they were put within this passive, "easy to give in" body.
You know even if people threatened to beat the shit out of me... eventually i would give up and let them beat the shit out of me so atleast i wouldent have to wonder what my consequence would be... or if id make it or not.
Its really relieving to give up i guess... even though it ruins your life... its just alot more comfortable.... until the effects of it start to wear in or feel like they are wearing in.... then you go nuts and have this "surge" of creative energy that goes out fast until your back at square one....
still in the same old job, maybe one day another or another or another
minimal payment, no real benefits towards yourself or the rest of humanity.... such a ridiculous task that goes nowhere.
it feels like im going through a midlife crisis almost... does that mean i will die at 42?
Am i SUPPOSED to do something great with these "talents" i have? Or are they like everyone elses talents... where my parents and friends have made them much bigger than they really are.
Perhaps my talents and abilities are great except they were put within this passive, "easy to give in" body.
You know even if people threatened to beat the shit out of me... eventually i would give up and let them beat the shit out of me so atleast i wouldent have to wonder what my consequence would be... or if id make it or not.
Its really relieving to give up i guess... even though it ruins your life... its just alot more comfortable.... until the effects of it start to wear in or feel like they are wearing in.... then you go nuts and have this "surge" of creative energy that goes out fast until your back at square one....
still in the same old job, maybe one day another or another or another
minimal payment, no real benefits towards yourself or the rest of humanity.... such a ridiculous task that goes nowhere.
it feels like im going through a midlife crisis almost... does that mean i will die at 42?
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The problem for most of the people nowadays is that we were braught up on movies/television/video games/etc.. that tell us we can all be the 'hero'. Everyone wants to be in the spotlight and if they don't want to we give them medication. Everyones told they are special and then told to stand in line.
Im probally the crappiest cheer-er-upper ever but just try to surround yourself with people and things that make you happy is what it all boils down to.
Oh and ditch that McJob.
[Edited on Oct 02, 2004 8:16PM]