invisible woman blues, by henry rollins (from black coffee blues)
before i fall asleep at night, i close my eyes and wrap myself around you. i can feel your breath on my neck, in my mind it's real. you're real. just thinking about it makes me stare at the wall for minutes at a time like i'm in a trance today i sat in teh park and wrote hundreds of words to you. i looked up and saw people staring. they're always staring at me, pointing, trying to pry under my skull. trying to read my thoughts. i don't let them. i will never let them get to you. don't worry, i will never let them touch you, i will never sell you out. tonight i will be with you, entwined. your smile will light one thousand jungles on fire. we will hover above the war-torn filth-machine that this city is. in my thoughts i am invincible, when we touch we are all things. the sun is setting, the dirty air is clawing at my lungs. one thousand razored eyes try to rip me to shreds as i hurry along. i hear their tiny words as i pass, "look, he moves like a rat." i'm almost to my hole, i will be with you soon, for now this miserable though will have to do. i have so much to tell you. it will take time, it will be fractured, like me. i know you understand me. i'm walking on a bridge, my back is to the sun, my face to the abyss. will you come with me?
demon sun burning my back with red eyes, my pupils being sucked out by the vacant spaces in their faces. we are the only ones left. don't let them scar you with their weakness. they will cripple you with their lives, they will make you want to die just to get away from them. they don't know how dangerous they are. they are immune to their poison. that's the way they keep doing it to each other life after life. sometimes i feel like glass, if i breathe to hard, i will implode. i can feel ground glass in my guts. i'm an alien, and i don't remember the last time a human made me feel anything at all. sometimes i feel frozen, like a piece of iron, like a factory that's been shut down. yeah, right now i'm frozen, my thoughts are like frozen fingers like a spider made of ice. in your eyes i see a flame that draws me to you. you are everything to me. i sing songs to you. i live in front of strangers, they freeze me out, they empty me. i feel like an old warehouse. do you want me?
tonight, you and i walk together in the fall air, street lamps throw down shadowed light, the leaves under our feet. imagine that, for once, not alone. i can close my eyes and see it. i can breathe in and smell the wood burning fire, miles away from this hotel room. the stale air that claws at my lungs, the grey wall that reduce my eyes to instruments of torture. tonight, i am the king of self infliction. you and me on this autumn night. i can't talk to them, you should hear my word kill themselves, i cripple myself with them. the closer i get, the farther away i know i am. tonight my heart incincerates my guts, my eyes freeze and burn in their sockets. have you ever fallen into yourself and gotten lost?
i'm so far from them, yet at times i wish for them. i wish i could understand them and deal with them without all the pain and bitterness that comes with contact. at times i wish for them to touch me. strangers pass by me in this wounded, leaking night. they burn me, vile weaklings. i hide my face in my hands when they pass, knowing my gaze would turn them to stone. they can't stop my eyes from their righteous penetration. they see too much. i want to smash my head like a pig bank, stick pins into my eyes and let it all pour onto the floor. there must be kindness in blindness, because there is none here.
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even though i know that she'll never know i meant it for her, the one who i think this about every day.
-the geist
before i fall asleep at night, i close my eyes and wrap myself around you. i can feel your breath on my neck, in my mind it's real. you're real. just thinking about it makes me stare at the wall for minutes at a time like i'm in a trance today i sat in teh park and wrote hundreds of words to you. i looked up and saw people staring. they're always staring at me, pointing, trying to pry under my skull. trying to read my thoughts. i don't let them. i will never let them get to you. don't worry, i will never let them touch you, i will never sell you out. tonight i will be with you, entwined. your smile will light one thousand jungles on fire. we will hover above the war-torn filth-machine that this city is. in my thoughts i am invincible, when we touch we are all things. the sun is setting, the dirty air is clawing at my lungs. one thousand razored eyes try to rip me to shreds as i hurry along. i hear their tiny words as i pass, "look, he moves like a rat." i'm almost to my hole, i will be with you soon, for now this miserable though will have to do. i have so much to tell you. it will take time, it will be fractured, like me. i know you understand me. i'm walking on a bridge, my back is to the sun, my face to the abyss. will you come with me?
demon sun burning my back with red eyes, my pupils being sucked out by the vacant spaces in their faces. we are the only ones left. don't let them scar you with their weakness. they will cripple you with their lives, they will make you want to die just to get away from them. they don't know how dangerous they are. they are immune to their poison. that's the way they keep doing it to each other life after life. sometimes i feel like glass, if i breathe to hard, i will implode. i can feel ground glass in my guts. i'm an alien, and i don't remember the last time a human made me feel anything at all. sometimes i feel frozen, like a piece of iron, like a factory that's been shut down. yeah, right now i'm frozen, my thoughts are like frozen fingers like a spider made of ice. in your eyes i see a flame that draws me to you. you are everything to me. i sing songs to you. i live in front of strangers, they freeze me out, they empty me. i feel like an old warehouse. do you want me?
tonight, you and i walk together in the fall air, street lamps throw down shadowed light, the leaves under our feet. imagine that, for once, not alone. i can close my eyes and see it. i can breathe in and smell the wood burning fire, miles away from this hotel room. the stale air that claws at my lungs, the grey wall that reduce my eyes to instruments of torture. tonight, i am the king of self infliction. you and me on this autumn night. i can't talk to them, you should hear my word kill themselves, i cripple myself with them. the closer i get, the farther away i know i am. tonight my heart incincerates my guts, my eyes freeze and burn in their sockets. have you ever fallen into yourself and gotten lost?
i'm so far from them, yet at times i wish for them. i wish i could understand them and deal with them without all the pain and bitterness that comes with contact. at times i wish for them to touch me. strangers pass by me in this wounded, leaking night. they burn me, vile weaklings. i hide my face in my hands when they pass, knowing my gaze would turn them to stone. they can't stop my eyes from their righteous penetration. they see too much. i want to smash my head like a pig bank, stick pins into my eyes and let it all pour onto the floor. there must be kindness in blindness, because there is none here.
-------------------------------------
even though i know that she'll never know i meant it for her, the one who i think this about every day.
-the geist
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
just go get some Starbucks and call it cool.