geeksusie

Hey all,

I know I have been absent for a while, so I will fill you in on what has been going on in my life.

I have been living with a herniated disk in my back since February. I am feeling much better now, but it was very painful for quite a while. I couldn't even dress myself. Kelli has been wonderful throughout this entire ordeal. Heck, she has been totally awesome. I have been going to physical therapy and taking medication, so now I can function. I still have pain every now and then and my left foot is numb, but I am improving. My flexibility is coming back slowly, but I am still relegated to being a bottom in the bedroom, lol. I go back to the orthopedic in 2 weeks and will find out what the next step is then. Probably an MRI and more PT. Or they could send me to a chiropractor. Surgery will be the last option.

Okay, enough of that shit. I have been doing other stuff too. Spending a lot of time in NYC. Mostly on the weekends, taking photographs and learning. I have made friends with a very nice group of people there that I am very comfortable with. It's a very diverse group, I guess I can call 5 people a group. It always amazes me how people that come from very different environments can come together and become friends and support and motivate each other. I count myself very lucky to have become a part of this group. We are all meeting up this Monday evening and going to see Gin Wigmore at the Mercury Lounge. I am totally loving her new album.

Well, let me show you some of the things I have been working on. Please remember that I am still learning, so these are not quite gallery material....... yet!

Brooklyn & Manhattan Bridges


South Street Seaport


Brandi Carlile at The Beacon


Our House


It's good to be back, and starting to get my energy back as well. I think it's time for a poem, I haven't posted one in a while. Even with a bad back I can still put pencil to paper. Sp please, just humor me and give it a quick read. And keep your moans and groans to yourself!

While Away From You

There are things darling, I must confess
as fan blades waft the smoke from my duress
and lit cigarette
though it is a voluntary state mind you
this business of missing you in the chapped minutes, hardly for the empathetic
who can measure what is reasonable in such affairs
No, no, I confess this silliness at once
slicing it in half,
the feelings of genuinely missing your company and
the leaning on these quiet hours to sidetrack myself
from you
Oh I know I have sauntered about declaring the air of space
only to then coddle your presence in my mind like the first day of spring
It is my gift as a woman
to order such delicate confusions in intimacy, understood
Shhhh, I can hear the stampede of my own thoughts rushing
I can feel the tremor of loneliness again in this loft of time
I do not forbid it
For I have made a friend with even the worst part of myself,
she who sometimes walks haphazardly into life
boxing the shadows like a girl who needs glasses
or who bores herself to death with the same self talk

Darling, this can drive me crazy
this push and pull between what is us and ourselves
stuck like two peas in a pod
each free like pollen in the rush of wind
wanting intimacy, wanting solitude
kicking both like a rock to the line
But Darling, I have made a friend with even the worst part of you
she that walks right up in my vulnerable space and won't budge
looking at me when I am unaware
hearing more than I actually spoke
and I wonder what is your confession in it
word for me, your inner world
telling me something I can more apt to believe
than this weird reality

Waiting for you to come home, I am thinking myself into a maddening state
if slightly perhaps with some laziness in confronting self will
not to mope around inside my head
I'd rather get in yours
and even more places you keep...yes even more
But ok, I am caught in this solitude running amiss
Sigh, taking back my solitude and making Chinese food.