I don't know how else to put this
It's taken me so long to do this
Falling asleep and I can't see straight
My muscles feel like a melee
My body's curled in a U-shape
I put on my best but I'm still afraid
Propped up by lies and promises
Saving my place as life forgets
Maybe it's time I saw the world
I'm only here for a while
But patience is not my style
And I'm so tired that I gotta go
From the Urban Dictionary...Zzyzx is the last place on Earth.
What does this mean? Well, to many, I am sure it can mean many things. To me, it has meant many things over the years. First I hear the pain that the song relates coming from the person that wrote it. Then the song moves deeper into me. Over the years to me it has represented the stress of a business owner, the bar of expectations that I have set upon myself...it represents all the things I felt I should have accomplished already in life; it represents all the things I have overcome.
This song represents so much in my life...it reminds me of all the different crossroads that I encountered and makes me think of where I might be if I had chosen a different path at that time. But it also reminds me of what I am capable of and of all the reasons I keep trying to reach all those things I know I should have.
Relationships...It makes me think, if I had asked her to wait for me and not move away for the better job...would we be together still? would she be happy? what would I be doing? All these things come to me. And that's just SOME of the things I question for just ONE relationship. But then it reminds me to think of the fact that she is happy and I too can be.
This four minute song can often bring back so many thoughts and make me question my very existence...but it can also validate my choices and remind me LIFE is what we are living. Life isn't easy, Life isn't nice, and Life isn't perfect...but it IS beautiful.