I use to be happy once I couldnt understand way I wanted to end my life. That was 4 years ago and it only lasted a year. It was so silly I remember driving and thinking to my self why did I want to die all those years I was alive. Now I look back and desperately try to grasp the concept of being happy. I miss enjoying things I miss enjoying life. I am trying Im on antidepressants and Im going to seek counseling again. I just want to be all better right now Im so sick of this. Im so sick of concentrating all my time on thinking of ways to die and Im so sick of concentrating all of my energy on not letting myself kill myself. I hate being so sad I feel like a burden on every one. I just want to log in my SG and leave happy notes for everyone. But I cant when I feel like this. Ok bed time for me 
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argentumblack:
Sweetie...i've was their for a year....keep your chin up and you'll pull through. 
liz_marie1222:
I love you soooooo much Gabby. I know how this feels, but I know that that makes no difference when you feel this way. But think of it this way....If you were dead I would never be able to see you ever again. Since you are my favorite person in the whole world, your absence in my life would give me no reason to live. I know that sounds like a weird guilt trip but it's not. I am just trying to let you know how fucking important you are to me. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! Love is a reason for you to live. And I love you, there is nothing that will ever change that.