Poetry... it's been a long while, but I have started to write again. here is some of my work. If you like it let me know... if not Fuck off and die! thanks!
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Narration
I
Want to hear my story?
I'm sitting here trying to envision my soul into neat catchy phrases - I can't.
I don't see anything in here worth writing about. This is supposed to be an exercise in poetry, not futility. I labor in vain to produce something worth your energy.
My mind wanders towards the things I heard that drove me forward long ago
Trent telling me about my "Hurt" and Ness playing my personal cricket...
I know "I was wrong" and that someday I will be carried away by "Angel's Wings" but not this day boys, not this day.
Roger, you told everyone what lurked behind my blue eyes, but you didn't tell them how to cope with it.
Will you love me "when I'm gone?" Questions to answers that are 3 Doors Down, but I don't have a key for you. I lost it long ago, left on the nightstand in some three hour motel during a drunken stupor.
Sgt. McKenna still haunts me with the dirge of my fraternity. When it's my turn will you remember to play it for me?
II
I'm fucked up and I hate the world
Yes that means you, but not to worry you see, most of all I hate myself.
I sleep uneasy at night when I'm home. The Jack Daniels and Diazepam help, though.
Why did you make me do those things? I always want to ask, but cant' don't won't.
The horrible places I have been and the more horrible things I've done in the name of peace and humanity are what I hold onto when I'm alone in the dark;
Drunk and numb from my own hypocrisy, that hatred keeps me warm, so don't feel sorry about it. I don't.
I see their countless black, hollow eyes. They beg me to relent foolishly.
How man longs for humanity when it's humanity that makes us commit our most heinous acts.
You used me like a whore, made me act on your behalf and simply paid me for it. Yes it was you. You were not a patsy. You knew every time, when you went to Xtra-mart, what you were asking me to do.
III
You are sheep; carefree, oblivious. Danger surrounds you, but you don't see it.
You take comfort, though, the sheepdogs watch over you under the brim of their Stetsons; protecting you from the wolves that prey upon the sheep.
But me, you have me all wrong. I AM a wolf, but sometimes you need more then the sheepdog to protect you; you need a wolf of your own.
So ask yourself tonight when you go home. "Do I sleep well at night, knowing I'm safe in my bed, from the wolves in those faraway lands?"
You're welcome
Is this poetry? I don't know. But you wanted to hear my story.
__________________________________________________________________________________
How to win hearts and minds
7.62mm at a time
I've done it a hundred times it seems, but it's still hard to grasp.
3 pounds, that's it. A slight pressure really. The distance traveled measured in fractions; quarters and eighths.
Such a short trip under the slightest pressure leads to such a far off place especially when you are alone.
As if you are crossing the Rubicon North knowing you can never return to what has comforted you your entire life.
You can actually feel the changes Your heart rate rises, sweat begins to build on your skin.
You are engulfed in a sort of hellish flame that, somehow, always seems fitting. Your mind anticipates the need to quench some deep seeded primal act and starts to drench you.
Your mouth dries.
Senses though, don't heighten, they dull. You lose focus on everything but the dots. They are the key. You focus on the dots. They are the key
The rest is supposed to be a surprise but it's not.
You feel the serrations under your tip, they cut you, as you realize how difficult the 3 pounds are.
Figure 8s start, you know it's there, but now it's THERE. You hate your own body for conspiring against you like this. Struggling, you fight it
In the final moments of your own betrayal, it happens
Breath Pause hold
In an instant it's done.
You follow through, your hand moving in a motion that reminds you of the ocean; Sliding forward raising and rolling onto the swell crashing. Then, swiftly it retreats; leaving its remains, glimmering in the bright sunshine. It lays there, the only visible monument to the event.
The motion repeated in an instant, preparing for the repercussions of your inhumanity but it never comes.
It is done.
You think to yourself "It's lobster night in the chow hall."
_____________________________________________________________________________________
The Key to my
Happiness lingering,
Twelve steps away.
I see you, fleeting glimpses.
So elusive, taunting me
of hollow heart and empty soul.
Wandering mind, in your presence
Consumed by you it becomes madness
Fear, fear of failure and rejection
restrains me, burdening me
from the first step.
Intoxicated in your presence,
Seeking a return to what I lost long ago.
I crave to taste your freedom.
The happiness you are, pushing me.
Forward.
"Hello, My name is"
______________________________________________________________________________________
Untitled
You see
I'm sick inside and I know it
I think I'm dying sometimes.
They keep saying my outside is better,
but it's inside that's broken.
Eating away at me
203
193
183
173
163
153 now
They can't see it, but it's there
At this pace it will end soon,
When is enough, enough?
You see, I'm sick inside and I know it
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Juggernaut
A Spenserian Sonnet
For Isablle, because she said it was hard
I am the Juggernaut, Super Hero.
Saving the world from the terror of crime.
High protector of the Super Zero,
the world counts on me every single time.
Unobtainium bones under my flesh
With my Crimson Cape & my Cowboy Boots
In a black spandex suit that's made of mesh
The villains try to hit me when they shoot
their guns. They don't get it I AM the man!
Hybrid Gen X'er genes pulse through my guns
Just underneath my perfectly bronze tan
Uber-Villans beware your time has come.
Many others are jealous of my fame,
But don't hate the player just hate the game!
___________________________________________________________________________________
Narration
I
Want to hear my story?
I'm sitting here trying to envision my soul into neat catchy phrases - I can't.
I don't see anything in here worth writing about. This is supposed to be an exercise in poetry, not futility. I labor in vain to produce something worth your energy.
My mind wanders towards the things I heard that drove me forward long ago
Trent telling me about my "Hurt" and Ness playing my personal cricket...
I know "I was wrong" and that someday I will be carried away by "Angel's Wings" but not this day boys, not this day.
Roger, you told everyone what lurked behind my blue eyes, but you didn't tell them how to cope with it.
Will you love me "when I'm gone?" Questions to answers that are 3 Doors Down, but I don't have a key for you. I lost it long ago, left on the nightstand in some three hour motel during a drunken stupor.
Sgt. McKenna still haunts me with the dirge of my fraternity. When it's my turn will you remember to play it for me?
II
I'm fucked up and I hate the world
Yes that means you, but not to worry you see, most of all I hate myself.
I sleep uneasy at night when I'm home. The Jack Daniels and Diazepam help, though.
Why did you make me do those things? I always want to ask, but cant' don't won't.
The horrible places I have been and the more horrible things I've done in the name of peace and humanity are what I hold onto when I'm alone in the dark;
Drunk and numb from my own hypocrisy, that hatred keeps me warm, so don't feel sorry about it. I don't.
I see their countless black, hollow eyes. They beg me to relent foolishly.
How man longs for humanity when it's humanity that makes us commit our most heinous acts.
You used me like a whore, made me act on your behalf and simply paid me for it. Yes it was you. You were not a patsy. You knew every time, when you went to Xtra-mart, what you were asking me to do.
III
You are sheep; carefree, oblivious. Danger surrounds you, but you don't see it.
You take comfort, though, the sheepdogs watch over you under the brim of their Stetsons; protecting you from the wolves that prey upon the sheep.
But me, you have me all wrong. I AM a wolf, but sometimes you need more then the sheepdog to protect you; you need a wolf of your own.
So ask yourself tonight when you go home. "Do I sleep well at night, knowing I'm safe in my bed, from the wolves in those faraway lands?"
You're welcome
Is this poetry? I don't know. But you wanted to hear my story.
__________________________________________________________________________________
How to win hearts and minds
7.62mm at a time
I've done it a hundred times it seems, but it's still hard to grasp.
3 pounds, that's it. A slight pressure really. The distance traveled measured in fractions; quarters and eighths.
Such a short trip under the slightest pressure leads to such a far off place especially when you are alone.
As if you are crossing the Rubicon North knowing you can never return to what has comforted you your entire life.
You can actually feel the changes Your heart rate rises, sweat begins to build on your skin.
You are engulfed in a sort of hellish flame that, somehow, always seems fitting. Your mind anticipates the need to quench some deep seeded primal act and starts to drench you.
Your mouth dries.
Senses though, don't heighten, they dull. You lose focus on everything but the dots. They are the key. You focus on the dots. They are the key
The rest is supposed to be a surprise but it's not.
You feel the serrations under your tip, they cut you, as you realize how difficult the 3 pounds are.
Figure 8s start, you know it's there, but now it's THERE. You hate your own body for conspiring against you like this. Struggling, you fight it
In the final moments of your own betrayal, it happens
Breath Pause hold
In an instant it's done.
You follow through, your hand moving in a motion that reminds you of the ocean; Sliding forward raising and rolling onto the swell crashing. Then, swiftly it retreats; leaving its remains, glimmering in the bright sunshine. It lays there, the only visible monument to the event.
The motion repeated in an instant, preparing for the repercussions of your inhumanity but it never comes.
It is done.
You think to yourself "It's lobster night in the chow hall."
_____________________________________________________________________________________
The Key to my
Happiness lingering,
Twelve steps away.
I see you, fleeting glimpses.
So elusive, taunting me
of hollow heart and empty soul.
Wandering mind, in your presence
Consumed by you it becomes madness
Fear, fear of failure and rejection
restrains me, burdening me
from the first step.
Intoxicated in your presence,
Seeking a return to what I lost long ago.
I crave to taste your freedom.
The happiness you are, pushing me.
Forward.
"Hello, My name is"
______________________________________________________________________________________
Untitled
You see
I'm sick inside and I know it
I think I'm dying sometimes.
They keep saying my outside is better,
but it's inside that's broken.
Eating away at me
203
193
183
173
163
153 now
They can't see it, but it's there
At this pace it will end soon,
When is enough, enough?
You see, I'm sick inside and I know it
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Juggernaut
A Spenserian Sonnet
For Isablle, because she said it was hard
I am the Juggernaut, Super Hero.
Saving the world from the terror of crime.
High protector of the Super Zero,
the world counts on me every single time.
Unobtainium bones under my flesh
With my Crimson Cape & my Cowboy Boots
In a black spandex suit that's made of mesh
The villains try to hit me when they shoot
their guns. They don't get it I AM the man!
Hybrid Gen X'er genes pulse through my guns
Just underneath my perfectly bronze tan
Uber-Villans beware your time has come.
Many others are jealous of my fame,
But don't hate the player just hate the game!