fridgemagnet

Working titles of the self help book I'm ghostwriting for my dog.

1) Plan Ahead: Stop getting ambushed by the cat.

2) It's my anus! How to stop getting sniffed by every dog in town

3) My mom's a bitch: Admit it and move on!

4) Find richer humans: How to stop being such a financial burden and live a happier life.

I live in a very handsome place, but I dream about living in a very beautiful place.

I don't like dreaming. It's so impotent.

It's that time again. What time is it, Fridge?, you are probably asking yourself. Well I'llllllll fucking tell you, it's Google Image Search Karaoke time, aka the funnest thing I can think to do while I'm killing time at work waiting for the year to end.

I'm usually never bored at work, but after working my tits off 'round the clock all year, I told...
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Skinny angry men with tattoos have written a lot of songs that i like.

God I hate Reindeer.

God I hate Radiohead.

There's a fat country singer named Toby Keith. And frankly that's good, I think the best country singers are fat dudes and skinny chicks with huge tits, but I'm going sideways here, so let's get back to the point.

Toby Keith has a song...well it's more like a mumble, but it's intended to be a song called Red Solo Cup.

If you haven't heard it,...
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Pink is a panty snatcher.

Victoria's Secret is a Snatch Pantier, which is funny because they have a line of tight sweatpants for fat people called PINK. I wonder if the two are in cahoots.

you get nothin for nothin, and that's a fact.

Quote of the month courtesy of my bass player:

Dude my tone sounds like a cooler full of scorpions.