freakchef

Ok Prom was GRAND but this is my life now!

A couple of days ago my english ex finially got MSN messenger and added me right away. We chatted for 3 hours and all the while I was keeping my conversation apropeate and so was she but I could tell we left off where we were 4 years ago (which is on good grounds).

The problem I have is she hurt me sooooooooo much by cheating on me when i came back to Canada due to my Visa ending. I was gone for 2 months and a week before returning she told me she was with someone else and she was very sorry and that it just happened. 4 years later she is still with the same guy and she says she Loves him.

Back to the coversation with her. It came up today that the guy she is with is double her age! (I can care less what his age is but it was a shocker
) SO he's 42 and all day I was like 42 I cant fucking beleive that! 42!!!! (before you say love knows no age I agree) well she sent me this email today and I need help cause I cant trust my heart

SO heres a clip from her email


I have been in two minds about telling you this but I can't stop thinking about you. I can't lie to myself as I have gotten to know myself very well over the last few years. However I am with Tony and I do love him very much but I can't shake this feeling./Is it because you're my friend that never went away?
I don't know but I keep imagining us meeting again and then I feel really guilty because of Tony and how I feel about him./Really confused. Not doing this for attention or to mess u about

And the kicker is I dont know what to say and I also have feelings for another person but I really dont know how they feel about me so my heart is taking a beating

Any comment is welcome