i want a boy with a mohawk who doesnt talk much except around me. i want a girl who lives so fast and high that i know ill never catch her. i want a boy who will fall asleep on top of me and make me feel safe. i want a girl who will hold my hand all day long and make me feel all giddy. i want everybody all at once. and i dont want to be me.
i dont let people get too close to me. and i dont trust easily. ive been many things. ive been a daughter. a friend. a lier, a cheat, a lover, a smoker, a cutter, a basketball player, a sister, a best friend, an artist, a hookup, a designated driver, an accomplice, a dreamer, a theif. ive been many things though never all at once. cause then what would that make me? i like to be simple. to fit one catagory. i dont change myself around others but i hide parts of me and only allow certain aspects to be seen. i have never been in love.
lately ive been feeling a bit ansy. ive been craving, something, everything. ive got that feeling, ya know the one that comes right before you score. that itching in your veins, your skin, the one that takes over everything. but i dont know what it is that i want. what it is that i need. ive found myself falling into old patterns again. i thought it was drugs. that i needed a good high. but i found that it wasnt. i thought i needed release. that my skin needed to breath. but that wasnt it either. i thought maybe sex would solve things. but the further i go the sicker i feel. i thought i needed to clense myself. but throwing up isnt helping. its not something i need. its someone. i need to hear someone elses thoughts. someone elses dreams. i need to feel someone elses skin, hear them breath. i need to be anybody, but me.
i need to go to an art gallery. and spend all day trying to figure out lifes hidden meanings. i need to spend all day laying on the floor listening to van morrison. holding someones hand. i need to lay outside at night and count the stars with somebody. i need to go to a show and feel everything i am sang to someone else. perferably someone clutching me. i need watch tv all day and play footsies under the table. i need to feel someone elses skin. taste their sweat. hear their breathing.
i need someone to calm me down.
but i know that no ones gonna come to rescue me.
i dont let people get too close to me. and i dont trust easily. ive been many things. ive been a daughter. a friend. a lier, a cheat, a lover, a smoker, a cutter, a basketball player, a sister, a best friend, an artist, a hookup, a designated driver, an accomplice, a dreamer, a theif. ive been many things though never all at once. cause then what would that make me? i like to be simple. to fit one catagory. i dont change myself around others but i hide parts of me and only allow certain aspects to be seen. i have never been in love.
lately ive been feeling a bit ansy. ive been craving, something, everything. ive got that feeling, ya know the one that comes right before you score. that itching in your veins, your skin, the one that takes over everything. but i dont know what it is that i want. what it is that i need. ive found myself falling into old patterns again. i thought it was drugs. that i needed a good high. but i found that it wasnt. i thought i needed release. that my skin needed to breath. but that wasnt it either. i thought maybe sex would solve things. but the further i go the sicker i feel. i thought i needed to clense myself. but throwing up isnt helping. its not something i need. its someone. i need to hear someone elses thoughts. someone elses dreams. i need to feel someone elses skin, hear them breath. i need to be anybody, but me.
i need to go to an art gallery. and spend all day trying to figure out lifes hidden meanings. i need to spend all day laying on the floor listening to van morrison. holding someones hand. i need to lay outside at night and count the stars with somebody. i need to go to a show and feel everything i am sang to someone else. perferably someone clutching me. i need watch tv all day and play footsies under the table. i need to feel someone elses skin. taste their sweat. hear their breathing.
i need someone to calm me down.
but i know that no ones gonna come to rescue me.
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
tiamat:
i say it is a sign 
scattershot:
is yourarednighiten from that final fantasy saaven game lion gavcrather