frank_cotton

live, from the fortress of ultimate darkness, it's the all-night show, with your host, absolute evil himself, frank cotton! take it away, frank! why, thank you, frank, i think i just might, at that. hi kids, this here's frank, your host, and this is the allnight show. that song you just heard was YOU'RE GONNA GO FAR, KID, by THE OFFSPRING, off their disc, RISE AND FALL, RAGE AND GRACE, and a more appropriate song to kick off with, i can not compute. available @ AMAZON.COM, of course, and also @ BORDERS, which brings me to the start of tonight's bitch session. lots to go over, so the word o' day, and recommendations and all is gonna be late. or, at least, later. BORDERS people, what did i tell you just a short while ago, is FILING FOR BANKRUPTCY as early as next week! did you not hear me last time? i told you they needed help, didn't i? so why didn't you? help them, what the FUCK do you think i mean? i'm not playing here, if they fold THERE WILL BE HELL TO PAY! to ME, and PERSONALLY! get it? obviously not. so we'll just let that be the TOP STORY tonight, in our new feature, FUCKED UP NEWS! don't know what else to call it, and you'll soon find out why. BAD FUCKING NEWS? eh, don't think so. so, without any further bs, here's your news anchor, frank cotton. welcome aboard, frank! well, thank you kindly, frank, glad to be here, and to be of service to your many fine listeners. think i'll just get to it, here. first, or rather, second, is this: according to the AP (look it up), 50 year old JULIE SCHENECKER shot her kids, CALYX and BEAU, 13, in the head, twice, mind you, for the heinous crime of what? frank, did you see this? she shot them because they back-talked her! no shit, i'll be damned! i thought the old man was bad, what with his belt and all that, but, sheesh...appears her 16 year old, the GIRL, told the ptb that she'd been struck by moms twice, and the woman also had an accident where drug use was suspected, prior to this incident. is that FUCKED UP, or what? our next tragedy/travesty is, JAYNE PERKINS, 40 (what the hell does THAT matter), got a suspended 75-day sentence (this one's local) and a 750.00 fine. for what, you ask, why, ONE count of MISDEMEANOR DEATH BY VEHICLE. seems she actually killed TWO boys, DARYL BAUCUM, and ISAIAH REYNOLDS. oh, wait, she also gots to write an apology, do 100 hours community service, and present four sessions on DISTRACTED driving. yow, that's harsh. the cause, you wonder? RUNNING HER FUCKING MOUTH ON HER FUCKING CELL PHONE! settle down there, frank, don't want to pop a vessel. true, frank, but this shit just pisses me off...anyways, what's, oh, here it is, next, we have a piece of filth, one HAROLD 'BRIGHT'(?) HARRIS JR., local again, sentenced to 70 to 85 years (not too shabby, but make up your minds) for molesting a TEN-YEAR-OLD GIRL. two counts, consolidated, at gunpoint, no less, no specifics, but he was aquited in 2000 of molesting TWO OTHER GIRLS. well, folks, i'll be right back after a quick break, i think i'm going to throw up.