Well if my journal entries weren't boring enough, I dragged up some archaic files from the days of pen and paper (a.k.a. my old composition book journals). They aren't really in any particular order (a.k.a. no timeline here sucka'):
06/27/00: Life is a bowl of cereal, a rotted bug ridden, crust eyed milk curd bowl of shit bowl stained cereal and I'm floating in the middle with a roach ridden eaten crap cherrio for a float.
02/11/00: Poem entitled 'Cheap Drinks'
You did it,
now your dead.
It's you who said it, read it, breed it, set it free. Come home, forget about it. both of you. My heart in you hand, you squeeze-ever so slightly.
Cheap drinks, cheap tattoos. We love you. Come home, to cheap drinking tattoos. I won a little money and bought drinks for you and my friends. If it wern't for you I don't think I would be listening to the Stones, Bowie or even E.L.O. I owe you a drink, at least.
?/?/00: You can't have everything you want so you enjoy what you get.
You can never really own anything-it's all on loan. You cannot own a beautiful girl so just enjoy looking. You'll never own the loft so just enjoy partying in it.
11/1994 Front cover of journal has a picture of Juliette Lewis as a kid, Winnie the pooh's eeyore (sticker), Max Perlich (the antsy druggy in Drugstore Cowboy), and a pic. of one of Andy Warhol actors. Also the front reads things like: I love God! Andy Warhol is God! (etc.). Nothing good to report from this journal except: I can't think straight when I'm in love.
Other notes to self in fall of 1994, various saying to remember from salinger's catcher in the rye (I use to take pen and paper to the movies too to write down all my favorite catch phrases):
I don't want to abuse your goddamn hospitality.
Your a friendly bastard, you know that.
Casual as hell. Cool as hell.
That killed me.
Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start misssing everybody.
1992 (were really diggin' deep now). This journal has various bands like, G.G. Allin and the 5th st. sluts wriiten on the front along with Sub-hum-ans and Jethro Tull (or course). Actually just a bunch of boring crap other than my journal saying G.G. Allin and John Holmes on the cover.
Mostly those old journals are filled with crap like "how to boost your self-esteem" and "how to read a person like a book" notes. And stories of friends who either ditched me or guys who dumped me. hehehe. Ah to be young again. I use to think things were better back then but now I am thinking what a bunch of crap. Boring I know. I warned you.
06/27/00: Life is a bowl of cereal, a rotted bug ridden, crust eyed milk curd bowl of shit bowl stained cereal and I'm floating in the middle with a roach ridden eaten crap cherrio for a float.
02/11/00: Poem entitled 'Cheap Drinks'
You did it,
now your dead.
It's you who said it, read it, breed it, set it free. Come home, forget about it. both of you. My heart in you hand, you squeeze-ever so slightly.
Cheap drinks, cheap tattoos. We love you. Come home, to cheap drinking tattoos. I won a little money and bought drinks for you and my friends. If it wern't for you I don't think I would be listening to the Stones, Bowie or even E.L.O. I owe you a drink, at least.
?/?/00: You can't have everything you want so you enjoy what you get.
You can never really own anything-it's all on loan. You cannot own a beautiful girl so just enjoy looking. You'll never own the loft so just enjoy partying in it.
11/1994 Front cover of journal has a picture of Juliette Lewis as a kid, Winnie the pooh's eeyore (sticker), Max Perlich (the antsy druggy in Drugstore Cowboy), and a pic. of one of Andy Warhol actors. Also the front reads things like: I love God! Andy Warhol is God! (etc.). Nothing good to report from this journal except: I can't think straight when I'm in love.
Other notes to self in fall of 1994, various saying to remember from salinger's catcher in the rye (I use to take pen and paper to the movies too to write down all my favorite catch phrases):
I don't want to abuse your goddamn hospitality.
Your a friendly bastard, you know that.
Casual as hell. Cool as hell.
That killed me.
Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start misssing everybody.
1992 (were really diggin' deep now). This journal has various bands like, G.G. Allin and the 5th st. sluts wriiten on the front along with Sub-hum-ans and Jethro Tull (or course). Actually just a bunch of boring crap other than my journal saying G.G. Allin and John Holmes on the cover.
Mostly those old journals are filled with crap like "how to boost your self-esteem" and "how to read a person like a book" notes. And stories of friends who either ditched me or guys who dumped me. hehehe. Ah to be young again. I use to think things were better back then but now I am thinking what a bunch of crap. Boring I know. I warned you.
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
what's a guy supposed to do to be special?
i'm at work dollface...
you will recieve a plethora of love notes from a certain boy after 5 pm EST.
you're not coming back to our life...
i served my purpose for the time.
i filled your days with sad songs,
dramatic pauses and vegan laws...
it was the best sex you ever had.
and the way that you left me didn't make me special.
you turned me into my heroes
those sad ass boys in their basements
don't have shit on me anymore.
you turned me into my hereos
those sadass singers on their stages
aren't better than me anymore.
so now that you're gone i try to stay in bed
until at least noon or one pm...
i refuse to eat before four.
i have to remind myself not to drink anymore
until after ten
or this pathetic sadness starts again.
you turned me into my heroes
those sad ass boys in their basements
don't have shit on me anymore.
you turned me into my hereos
those sadass singers on their stages
aren't better than me anymore.
- from 'the last song i want to write about you' by allegra gellar.
that's what the journal entry was about...songs about my ex. it has turned into sort of a defiant, almost positive chorus...