foz

i'll miss you on here foz-zy!

AWWWWWWW I'm gonna miss you, I never got your email! I'll miss talking to you

Your girlfriend's mom hates Wood Allen, f- her!! haha. You know what movie does that to me? The Garden State. Whenever I need a good cry and I'm feeling lonley, I watch that movie. I always feel a little lonely and this movie reminds me that there's someone out there. Actually, I have to tell you, I met someone real special lately. My partner in crime. Lets see how it goes since I've known him 23 days.

Hey, you can catch me on Date My Mom reruns soon.

well. i guess they just don't think it's a movie to watch more than once. i think it's so fucking hilarious, woody, diane.. alda, angelica huston, they're all tops. and it's fun. and silly.

look here

yeah, it got pretty high score and all but most woody fans you talk to have never seen it. boo.

word. sgny knows how to entertain.

i'm in school and working part time. arts management and an artist residency program, respectively. awesome work, but it totally doesn't pay the bills. i can relate to the signing your life away stuff.

you do like some good films...and i remember the explanation of white and black from high school

White is the absence of color, or in light, it can be all colors

um, you can't link to gmail like that?!

what type of film do you like? and sorry i cant really think of anything too uplifting or inspiratioinal now...

At 26, you shouldn't be so serious about things. What's her birthday may I ask? Scorpios don't get a long with signs like aries, cancer and virgo. Not that you believe in that stuff (I do slightly, refuse to date Libras...always turn out to be full of themselves) I had an okay weekend. I feel slightly guilty because last night I got inebriated and found myself making out with someone I shouldn't be. Not that he's involved or anything but he's one out of three best friends who all keep trying to get into my pants. Two have succeded so far and I was hoping to keep a reputation by not fooling around with them all. But they are all too sweet and adorable. haha They all pretend to care that I've slept with some of them but i think secretly they don't give a shit. It's kinda sad too I guess because all three are sweet guys that I've made a good connection with and yet-they are all too sensative to get into anything serious with me. It's probably why I'm still single. How was your weekend?

I work at 6 on Mondays. Its really horrible.

I'm sorry but how the HELL did she get that email? Fucking annoying. Some things are not for the one you talk about to hear becase they will not understand it, and just feel really bad. I'm sorry. I hope things will work out for you.

Also, thanks for the very kind things you posted about the crazyness that went on recently. Today's been a much calmer day, even if things are still hard as they are, with my brother who can't almost walk, I have to help him all the time, and my mom also being in pain right now, problems with a knee, and I'm exhausted because I still can't sleep very well. Da da damn. But I'm OK. Tomorrow I'll try to go on a long walk finally... it's been crazy weather the last two days.

I'm sorry that your girl is in pain. To be honest though, men say things that they don't mean all the time. Sometimes right to your face. A mature girl needs to not take an email, that you sent in privacy, to heart. I'm sure that it was painful for her, and I would understand her pain if I were in her shoes. But she doesn't need to turn it into something so completely intense. You were venting and trying to work things out in your head and sometimes when we write things that make us upset and mad, we realize that those things aren't always true. An example I can make for this is, the guy I dated for 2 years, you've read about him in the journal. I was, for the first time in two years, giving him shit about not hanging out with me on the last night we'd be able to see each other for an entire month. Keep in mind, I waited for a few weeks for him to finish finals and start up a new job and I was patient. But instead, he wants to go to a birthday party for a friend (who is female I might add, but I didn't point that out). I was upset and I told him that it wasn't fair. His reply to me was, 'see, this is why I'm not datiing you..because I can't make certain commitments" Now, I was livid by hearing this because he very well knew that we had something together that was very close and intimate and it was driving me crazy that he wasn't taking things to the next level (not that I was pressuring him to do so). But in reality, he said that to push me away because he felt guilty that he wasn't doing right by me. In the end, I didn't let myself get hurt by this, because if you get mad about every little thing a guy says, you're dumb. I have certainly wrote enough "unsent" angry emails to ex's and if they ever saw those, I dont think that the friendship I now share with them all would exsist. But once I said it, it was out of me and I realize I don't really feel that way about the PERSON, just the particular experience that I hadn't really dealt with. Also, to be honest, you seem generally remourseful about the things you wrote, and it seems you've conveyed that to her as well. Guys NEVER applogize to me for the things they say. Maybe that's just me but I would let it go, it's not fair to hold things over people's heads, it's just as bad as the pain you caused her. Hopefully, your relationship isn't always like this because it's going to be a long and bumpy road.

I'm doing better, time heals all wounds. That and guilty-"are you okay?" phone calls from the uncommitmentable boy...hahaha But I'm taking a break from drinking ...I don't want to drown my sorrows