So I had a really depressing realization.
On Myspace, I searched for everyone in my graduating class from my graduating year. Then, solely out of curiosity, I browsed all the people and noted their listed sexualities. Some things that I found interesting were which people listed their sexual orientation as "No Answer," or "Not Sure," which pretty much means, "I've hooked up once with a person of the same sex and I'm not sure what to make of it."
Of the 67 listed people in my graduating class, here's how it broke down for the non-hets:
-1 male "not sure"
-3 male "no answer"
-7 female "no answer"
-1 female "bi"
Of all 67 people, only two listed themselves as openly gay (even though I know at least two of the "no answer" males to be openly gay, so much so as to never have had a girlfriend). Or should I say, one is listed as gay and one as lesbian. And that would be me and one of my best friends, Andrew. Ange came out to me during my Freshman year of college, though we all suspected way before that. I came out to him maybe 3 years after that. Though we all suspected way before that.
The funny part is, Andrew was my first boyfriend, and I was his first girlfriend. He remains to this day as my second longest relationship, even though we never made it past first base. I think we were both ok with that, which is why we lasted about a year with minimal romantic contact.
Still, it makes me sad/angry that only three people I went to high school with have the guts to publicize their alternative sexualities (two gay, one bi), when it is clear to me that so many more were not heterosexuals. There were 3 openly gay guys I remember during my high school years, one of whom I couldn't find on Myspace, and two of whom listed themselves as "no answer." There were 4 openly lesbian girls, none of whom I could find Myspace pages for.
Most of the "no answer" girls ("I hooked up once with a person of the same sex once and I'm not sure what to make of it,") are the flaky-bisexual types, the kind that only seem to play up their attraction to women because it is in fashion, and because it brings them more male attention. Of the 7 girls that have listed themselves as "no answer," I would say that 5 of them were straight girls looking for attention, and the other 2 may have actually been bisexual. Ironically, I would put the girl who listed herself as "bisexual" under the "straight girls looking for attention" category, too.
FWI, when I looked for gay-listed people in the graduating years before and after mine, I found 3. Two were in the year after mine (one listed as "lesbian," although clearly a male drag queen, and one listed as "gay" who I didn't know, whose photos were solely sexual and nude). The third, I am happy to report, was in the year after me and listed as "gay." He was a boy who was constantly picked during high school on for being "queer" and a "pussy," and he denied it to the end. I'm happy he's come to terms with himself.
Still, I wish that the people who were truly gay (or bisexual, for that matter) could find the strength to list themselves as such to the public. Good luck, you guys.
/rant
On Myspace, I searched for everyone in my graduating class from my graduating year. Then, solely out of curiosity, I browsed all the people and noted their listed sexualities. Some things that I found interesting were which people listed their sexual orientation as "No Answer," or "Not Sure," which pretty much means, "I've hooked up once with a person of the same sex and I'm not sure what to make of it."
Of the 67 listed people in my graduating class, here's how it broke down for the non-hets:
-1 male "not sure"
-3 male "no answer"
-7 female "no answer"
-1 female "bi"
Of all 67 people, only two listed themselves as openly gay (even though I know at least two of the "no answer" males to be openly gay, so much so as to never have had a girlfriend). Or should I say, one is listed as gay and one as lesbian. And that would be me and one of my best friends, Andrew. Ange came out to me during my Freshman year of college, though we all suspected way before that. I came out to him maybe 3 years after that. Though we all suspected way before that.
The funny part is, Andrew was my first boyfriend, and I was his first girlfriend. He remains to this day as my second longest relationship, even though we never made it past first base. I think we were both ok with that, which is why we lasted about a year with minimal romantic contact.
Still, it makes me sad/angry that only three people I went to high school with have the guts to publicize their alternative sexualities (two gay, one bi), when it is clear to me that so many more were not heterosexuals. There were 3 openly gay guys I remember during my high school years, one of whom I couldn't find on Myspace, and two of whom listed themselves as "no answer." There were 4 openly lesbian girls, none of whom I could find Myspace pages for.
Most of the "no answer" girls ("I hooked up once with a person of the same sex once and I'm not sure what to make of it,") are the flaky-bisexual types, the kind that only seem to play up their attraction to women because it is in fashion, and because it brings them more male attention. Of the 7 girls that have listed themselves as "no answer," I would say that 5 of them were straight girls looking for attention, and the other 2 may have actually been bisexual. Ironically, I would put the girl who listed herself as "bisexual" under the "straight girls looking for attention" category, too.
FWI, when I looked for gay-listed people in the graduating years before and after mine, I found 3. Two were in the year after mine (one listed as "lesbian," although clearly a male drag queen, and one listed as "gay" who I didn't know, whose photos were solely sexual and nude). The third, I am happy to report, was in the year after me and listed as "gay." He was a boy who was constantly picked during high school on for being "queer" and a "pussy," and he denied it to the end. I'm happy he's come to terms with himself.
Still, I wish that the people who were truly gay (or bisexual, for that matter) could find the strength to list themselves as such to the public. Good luck, you guys.
/rant
BUT some of them did put up gay or lesbian if that makes you feel any better
/PSA