foreverloaded

sooooo... I was alone... in the heat... thinking... wishing I had... some hard , satisifying,
cubes of ice... (you fucking pervs.)


I have this new theory: wanna hear it? I knew you did. Ok- they say (you know how "they" are, bastards)- anywho, they say that everyone has a twin, right? I believe that- to a point. Ex: I had a blue mohawk & was wearing a piece of leather w/black military ssafety pins as an outfit (This was back in the day, alright) and was at a show and this drunk dude was telling his friend," Heyyy- there's my sister Mary... That chick looks just like my sister Mary, man..." My point::Unlikely. ANDDD THERE IS ANOTHER INCIDENT IN WHICH i WAS AT A STORE (gOODWILL) AND i THOUGHT THIS CHICk (sORRY---caps is possessed) was my friend Rachel, so I was like, "Heyy Rachel, what's up?" She looked at me all weird like WHO the hell are you??? and said, "How did you know my name?" SO, this has nothing to do with my new thoery, just contextual.
So anyway- It wasn't my friend Rachel, just some weird identical chick (in the same town) named Rachel. Spooked the fuck out yet or what, kids? Stick with me...
So "they" call these "twins" we all supposedly have "Doppelgangers," namedx afer some dude-- I forget why, but nevermind...

Here's the greatness. I am guessing that everyone (based on my own experiences and that of a couple others I have spoken with regarding this phenom) has had someone in their life that either a) slept with all the same people that you did- afterwards, in theory--b) at the least, ATTEMPTED to date or lay all or at least two or more of your exes. You know, that bitch that goes after EVERY single guy you dated, even if it's YEARS later she just HAS to have them. Well- I have a girl like that. She LOVES my fucking leftovers, and i DO MEAN THAT LITERALLY HERE. This applies just as well with you guys. You may have thus far simply r4ferred to him as "Cockblocker" or "Scavenger" etc. So, that fact, combined with my undying admiration for PUNS, brought me THIS revelation: a new definition, and new word into my fucked up lexicon::::

DoppelBanger:noun: One, who for reasons yet unknown, seeks out and breeds with the leftovers and exes of one particular person. This behaviour sewems pathologic and tends to originate from a very poor self-image.
See: Crystal, who went after EVERY single geek I even briefly dated in high school; Even now, all these years later.
Usage: "Man, that weird biotch Crystal is my damn DoppelBanger! What a loser - she is STILL crossing names off my ex list!"

Ok see you next time then...