My NiteRunner is out of town. The advertising company he works for is doing some sort of a retreat at a ranch in Bandera, Tx. They are supposed to do some sort of activities to help with whatever and then at night there is a bar there that they apparently all go drink at. Needless to say I am not doing well. I have a hard time trusting men... every man that i have known in my adult life has cheated at one point or another. Including my ex-husband who cheating on my quite a few times. NiteRunner is ofcourse the exception... he has never cheated on anyone... (plus he is a college graduate and extremely intelligent and talented! ) but what worries me is I was only the second person he had ever slept with (the time before was only once and in high school) and I am his first real girlfriend... so i have to be kidding myself to think that he would end up with me... right? What guy ends up with their first real girlfriend? He works in a company of women... i think its like 4 guys and like 30 women... yup. He claims they dont want him because he is young (22) and they are all older... needless to say i explained to him that older women (shockingly) do like younger guys! zing!
Well its 10pm now... im guess they are probably drinking at the bar. He didnt want to go at all... and he told me he wasnt going to do the bar thing... but i havent talked to him since 9:30 AM .... so i guess who knows whats going on. He said he would call me back and i guess i dont want to bother him.
I will probably delete this blog later... enough of my self-pity. why cant i trust men????
btw... go comment on my shit!
My newly rejected set went up.... im rather fond of this one... please show it love!!!!
Well its 10pm now... im guess they are probably drinking at the bar. He didnt want to go at all... and he told me he wasnt going to do the bar thing... but i havent talked to him since 9:30 AM .... so i guess who knows whats going on. He said he would call me back and i guess i dont want to bother him.
I will probably delete this blog later... enough of my self-pity. why cant i trust men????
btw... go comment on my shit!
My newly rejected set went up.... im rather fond of this one... please show it love!!!!
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Till then try not to worry about it too much.
Success!! Do you give yourself credit for the successes? For the fact that you found each other, and that you've already had good times together?
Is the point really to be able to say on your deathbed that you kept him with you and you only (and that therefore you won)? By that kind of measure, there's no celebration until you get to the finish line. Wouldn't it be more satisfying to enjoy time you have together without measuring the duration of your relationship against some always-retreating perfect goal?
I get that you've come to expect the men you're with to break their commitments. That's sad.
It'd be sadder if you got so caught up in waiting for the failure that you didn't let yourself notice anything else...