The past few days have been completely up, down, back, forth, sideways, and over there with the alternation of good and bad happenings.
You and your third dimension.
What about it?
Oh nothing, its cute. We have five.
Thousand!
Yes, five thousand.
Dont question it!
Oh yeah? Well I only see two.
Well that sounds like a personal problem.
It feels like I just need one more good push in either direction to decide if its been a great week or an awful one. It would have to be something good and juicy thoughIm betting either Bush is discovered to have been secretly carrying on an affair with Misty Mundae and resigns in shame, or the Neo Nazis whose faces we were led to believe (via a government conspiracy) melted off in Raiders are really alive and well in a secret lab deep underground in the Congo, and theyve cloned Hitler. With sexy results!
So today I am rudely awakened by monophonic stylings of the Mario theme emanating from my cellular phone. I made a doctors appointment a few days ago to get a check up, what with the blacking out at work, and they did some blood work just in case. So they were calling to let me know that while my sugar levels looked fine, my anemia has come back (which explains why Ive been sleeping all the livelong day) and they want to put me back on iron supplements (which I hate). So my mom comes in and I tell her this -- and the first and only thing I hear about it is how its my fault for not eating or sleeping, despite my pointing out that this is in fact damn near all I do. The womans knocking my hobbies. So personally, Im a little bit upset about the whole thing (return of disease that saps what little energy I tend to havemedication that I absolutely despisebeing woken up 20 minutes early) and spent all of breakfast sitting right across the table from her silently crying my eyes out and she doesnt even notice. There were teardrops splattering on my placemat. It was like a fucking country song.
Anywaythe good news is it turns out the Salvation Army gets racecar beds in every one or two weeks! Which means -- thats right! -- both myself and a stupid orphan can race our way into dreamland. That orphan may have the advantage of being lighter from eating nothing but gruel, but I have longer arms and can distract him by poking him with a stick. Its foolproof. I will win. I just hope they dont get our dreams mixed upnailing William Shatner while Leonard Nimoy watches and jerks off in the corner could really mess a kid up.
Some more good newsI got my grades for last term, finally! My geriatric piano teacher gave me a glowing report, but forgot that I requested grades and gave me a Pass, so once I get back to school and have her change that to the A I know shes going to give me thatll up my score a bit, and my lazy bum of a psych teacher hasnt turned in any grades yet, but Im about 90% sure thatll be an A as wellbut even without those grades I have a 3.66 GPA for the term!!
I AM THE SMARTEST MAN ALIVE!!!
Seriously though, the only reason I got an A- in my 2 credit Chinese and Japanese calligraphy class is because my teacher has no idea who I amI didnt turn in any of the last three or four homework assignments except for the final project and I slept in that classoftenmy naps interrupted only by spurts of doodling (wow that sounded dirtyI am snickering my ass off like the mature individual I am, as evidenced by my use of the SAT word stupidheads in my set intro) and in my evaluation he said that I always turned the work in, and was always alert and attentive in class. HA! Also at one point in my Japanese evaluation, my teacher referred to me by the name of another student in the class. But I can see how itd be hard to keep us all straight seeing as theres, oh, what, five students in that class? It took me a minute to even realize her mistake, at first I thought she was just bragging about the other girl doing well on her report aside from verb trouble.
I desire a number of annoying novelty T-shirts:
More good news(I know by now youre wondering how I manage to find things to bitch about with all the rocking in my lifebelieve meits a skill) my mom tells me yesterday that these people I did some modeling work for in exchange for a disc of pictures sent the pictures after all, quite a while ago, and she had forgotten to tell me and put them somewhere safe so shed remember to give them to me. Yeah, you guessed it, she lost them
At least she remembered to tell me about itthey took the pictures nearly six months ago and I found their contact info while cleaning my room yesterday and was going to call them to complainhahaso Im really excited to see those, assuming she finds them like ever.
Oh and someone finally posted the nipple-pancake-eating fun from the SGNC pancake party:
Myself and the lovely Ardilla.
Same lady with the lovely Idjiit.
I was talking to my cousin and best friend since childhood just now about her study abroad and assorted cavorting about in London, and the following exchange ensued, which made me very happy. She knows me so well:
meee: well i'm getting a racecar bed
meee: so i'm excited about that
her: haha for your dorm room
her: ahhahaha
meee: no
meee: for home
her: that is so perfect for you
her: hahahha
meee: i wish i could take it to school
her: you're a 12 year old
I want to flirt with John Ritter. Our conversations will be rife with innuendo.
North Carolina this Saturday!
Maryland next Saturday!
I am the champion of interstate travel! Dont question it!
I may or may not perform my journies to the North and South from the confines of my racecar bed. But you can bet they will be epic, regardless. Epic.
You and your third dimension.
What about it?
Oh nothing, its cute. We have five.
Thousand!
Yes, five thousand.
Dont question it!
Oh yeah? Well I only see two.
Well that sounds like a personal problem.
It feels like I just need one more good push in either direction to decide if its been a great week or an awful one. It would have to be something good and juicy thoughIm betting either Bush is discovered to have been secretly carrying on an affair with Misty Mundae and resigns in shame, or the Neo Nazis whose faces we were led to believe (via a government conspiracy) melted off in Raiders are really alive and well in a secret lab deep underground in the Congo, and theyve cloned Hitler. With sexy results!
So today I am rudely awakened by monophonic stylings of the Mario theme emanating from my cellular phone. I made a doctors appointment a few days ago to get a check up, what with the blacking out at work, and they did some blood work just in case. So they were calling to let me know that while my sugar levels looked fine, my anemia has come back (which explains why Ive been sleeping all the livelong day) and they want to put me back on iron supplements (which I hate). So my mom comes in and I tell her this -- and the first and only thing I hear about it is how its my fault for not eating or sleeping, despite my pointing out that this is in fact damn near all I do. The womans knocking my hobbies. So personally, Im a little bit upset about the whole thing (return of disease that saps what little energy I tend to havemedication that I absolutely despisebeing woken up 20 minutes early) and spent all of breakfast sitting right across the table from her silently crying my eyes out and she doesnt even notice. There were teardrops splattering on my placemat. It was like a fucking country song.
Anywaythe good news is it turns out the Salvation Army gets racecar beds in every one or two weeks! Which means -- thats right! -- both myself and a stupid orphan can race our way into dreamland. That orphan may have the advantage of being lighter from eating nothing but gruel, but I have longer arms and can distract him by poking him with a stick. Its foolproof. I will win. I just hope they dont get our dreams mixed upnailing William Shatner while Leonard Nimoy watches and jerks off in the corner could really mess a kid up.
Some more good newsI got my grades for last term, finally! My geriatric piano teacher gave me a glowing report, but forgot that I requested grades and gave me a Pass, so once I get back to school and have her change that to the A I know shes going to give me thatll up my score a bit, and my lazy bum of a psych teacher hasnt turned in any grades yet, but Im about 90% sure thatll be an A as wellbut even without those grades I have a 3.66 GPA for the term!!
I AM THE SMARTEST MAN ALIVE!!!
Seriously though, the only reason I got an A- in my 2 credit Chinese and Japanese calligraphy class is because my teacher has no idea who I amI didnt turn in any of the last three or four homework assignments except for the final project and I slept in that classoftenmy naps interrupted only by spurts of doodling (wow that sounded dirtyI am snickering my ass off like the mature individual I am, as evidenced by my use of the SAT word stupidheads in my set intro) and in my evaluation he said that I always turned the work in, and was always alert and attentive in class. HA! Also at one point in my Japanese evaluation, my teacher referred to me by the name of another student in the class. But I can see how itd be hard to keep us all straight seeing as theres, oh, what, five students in that class? It took me a minute to even realize her mistake, at first I thought she was just bragging about the other girl doing well on her report aside from verb trouble.
I desire a number of annoying novelty T-shirts:
More good news(I know by now youre wondering how I manage to find things to bitch about with all the rocking in my lifebelieve meits a skill) my mom tells me yesterday that these people I did some modeling work for in exchange for a disc of pictures sent the pictures after all, quite a while ago, and she had forgotten to tell me and put them somewhere safe so shed remember to give them to me. Yeah, you guessed it, she lost them
At least she remembered to tell me about itthey took the pictures nearly six months ago and I found their contact info while cleaning my room yesterday and was going to call them to complainhahaso Im really excited to see those, assuming she finds them like ever.
Oh and someone finally posted the nipple-pancake-eating fun from the SGNC pancake party:
Myself and the lovely Ardilla.
Same lady with the lovely Idjiit.
I was talking to my cousin and best friend since childhood just now about her study abroad and assorted cavorting about in London, and the following exchange ensued, which made me very happy. She knows me so well:
meee: well i'm getting a racecar bed
meee: so i'm excited about that
her: haha for your dorm room
her: ahhahaha
meee: no
meee: for home
her: that is so perfect for you
her: hahahha
meee: i wish i could take it to school
her: you're a 12 year old
I want to flirt with John Ritter. Our conversations will be rife with innuendo.
North Carolina this Saturday!
Maryland next Saturday!
I am the champion of interstate travel! Dont question it!
I may or may not perform my journies to the North and South from the confines of my racecar bed. But you can bet they will be epic, regardless. Epic.
VIEW 25 of 47 COMMENTS
So, to that end, I will try to give you that push you need. How do I plan to do this you ask? Well that's easy by making this THE GREATEST JOURNAL COMMENT EVER
Ok so first, the "I read your journal, and to prove it, I'm going to reply and talk about certain parts so that you can see for a fact that I did and can empathize with your current life goings on". So, here we go.
ATHF rules.
My E6 voicemail trumps your Mario monophonic ring tone. But only barely. Speaking of which, after a period of inactivity where I tried to rehabilitate myself from all things Electric and Sixish I played Nuclear War (On the Dance Floor) a couple times tonight and did the whole Risky Business dancing and air guitar and lip synching in the middle of my apartment in my underwear while eating PB&J and milk. I've decided this is the way these songs were intended to be heard, and I will not deny them that.
Also, Dick mentions some ramblings on their website about non-touring life in NYC (yeah that's right, NYC, I didn't go for it, deal with it). And he's eagerly awaiting to tour again for the new album. You want to come to California with me?
Anemia huh. See, that's what you get for rotting your eyeballs on that computer all day. It's a sickness!! Seriously though, I used to be anemic too, so I know how much it sucks. Being skinny kid is awesome except when it sucks, which unfortunately more than I'd like. I don't remember iron supplements but that would make sense. I do remember having to drink these nasty bottles of grossness which I believe now are Pedialyte, but back before they had flavors, just regular grossness flavor. And what's up with that? Stop putting all medicines in Cherry flavor, it doesn't make them taste any less like ass, it just tastes like Cherry-flavored ass now.
I think Jewish moms and Latin moms are a lot alike, from what I've learned working with two Israelis. Likewise, I think our moms are a lot alike; I haven't lived with mine for 4 years so aside from the abhorred phone call now and then I don't have as much of a pit of distaste at the pit of my stomach as you seem to. But I've been there. It's weird, how my mom would always be so overprotective about some things, yet when I really was going through something, she'd be like "I'm sure you can handle it". I dunno if it was tough love/hurt's you more than me ridiculousness or what. Meh.
I would totally kick that orphan kid's ass if I were you, but, then again, you never mentioned why he was an orphan
Your grades and that you requested grades in a school infamous for not giving grades only raises your geek quotient, in case you were still insecure from that quiz only proves that cell phone microwaves, frequent urination, Detroit disco funk rock, and 18,043 IE windows is the perfect recipe for becoming a fucking genius. We should patent this. Or, keep it to ourselves and laugh/point at others. In fact, I may do that anyway. Anyway, I'm glad we didn't make you fail.
And like I said, take it easy on those teachers. I mean, in a class of a dozen kids, I'm sure you don't stick out at all.
Did I mention you suck? I totally want like a bajillion things off that site now, but they're all so friggin' expensive. I will so not pay $20 for a t-shirt, and I can't even invoke your five-finger discount talent. Damn!
I really seriously want like everything on there and will probably update my journal with it once I'm done with this ridiculously long (yet no less awesome) comment. In fact, I went to buy the Mario UNO set, because it was something I can actually afford and it was out of stock
SCORE.
I've bought three UNO sets since October. They don't sell regular UNO sets anymore, and searching for them I've found specially branded ones each no less awesome than the last. While getting the Mario set I saw a Ren & Stimpy set and was torn for a second.
I would totally get this for you if I had a $20 bill tree.
And now I will floor you with equally glorious retail wonderfulness. So...I was driving home tonight, and I took an earlier exit cause I was in the right lane and people can't drive for shit here. Anyway, I'm taking a street I don't usually take, and what do my eyes see through my furrowed brow? That wonderful blue sign with white letters spelling out a name so fun, even saying what it does is fun. And I didn't know about this IHOP either. So when I got home I discovered two things.
One, there are no less than three (3) IHOPs within a two mile radius of my apartment. And at least a dozen within the immediate area beyond that. See, there's a lot of hotels here because it's touristy, so I figure hotels and breakfast places go together which explains a lot. I AM IN IHOP MECCA. It's heavenly. Truly.
So now you're saying, Ace, get to the fucking point about retail wonderfulness. Ok then, no need to get all snippy. While I was at the website, I ran into this. Once again, I'd so get you that IHOP watch from the same tree. And a shirt for myself. I wonder what staff would say if you went into an IHOP with IHOP merch? I mean, they'd have to say something right? You can have a shit-eating grin on your face the whole time just waiting for a comment. I think that would be the best part.
Random interlude A giant bottle of Listerine and three DVDs. Yes, I just came from Target. And I only admit this to you and no one else, but I picked up and looked at Saved by the Bell: Seasons 1 & 2. I am not proud of myself, but I put it down again.
Ok and now the obligatory "related commentary to seem like I hadn't been thinking about this all day and instead just came by to reply comments made in my journal."
That shirt would actually be awesome for Disco, but I am very much depressed now that I cannot buy a stun gun with that setting. I may need one of these comments for myself. And Sammich is either a big fat liar, or has usurped you as the smartest man alive.
How am I doing so far? Not as good as I'd hoped I'm afraid. Which is ok. I plan to end with a bang, because I have backup ammunition in the form of...
FLASH E6 PARODY MOVIES...
http://www.nevillesgarden.co.uk/animation.php?a=electric6&name=flash
http://www.rathergood.com/gaybar/
SINGING MONKEYS, FLYING PUPPIES, VIKING KITTENS
Oh the joy, the pure joy of it all.