farrah

Something I wrote yesterday. Have patience, it gets steamy.

In the dim theater, one foot on the seat in front, the other intricately placed between his legs, he rubbed my upper thigh hidden beneath the extra sweater I brought precisely for that purpose. I began to wonder if we could get a refund on the movie tickets, despite the film being half way done. Not because Sin City was a particularly bad flick, but I couldnt wait any longer. It had been two excruciating weeks since our trip to Toronto and my shower head couldnt compare to the pressure Id felt when he was inside me.

For two long weeks all I could think of was that spot, that spot..right.there. Hed reached places deeper than anything Id ever felt. Inner walls and crevices before untouched now ached, throbbed every time I thought back to that monumental night at the Delta Chelsea. I had had a taste on our escape from the city, away from judgmental eyes, and wanted more of that carefree passion.

I can tough it out I assured myself. In our own morbid way the content on screen, the blood, the gore, the guns, and hooking was a kind of delicious foreplay for what was to come. That was the good thing about Mark, he didnt dismiss my love for the dark, but given his 3 years on the Homicide Unit, embraced my appreciation, admired it even.

I tugged at his massive bicep, brought it closer forcing his hand to continue teasing my thighs under the black knit. I gently nestled my head into his shoulder, kissed his baby blue Puma tee (I once told him blue was his colour) and let out a slow, deep sigh.

Youre going to have to stop doing that he jokingly threatened, giving a devious side-long stare.
Those moans are killing me.

And his perpetual petting over my jeans wasnt completely doing me in?

That spot was once again pounding that familiar beat and I wasnt sure Id be able to stand and walk out of the theatre when the lights came on after the show.

Thats fine, Ill stop.for now I replied with an equally devious tone, challenging his temptation and turning away, detangling our legs and facing the screen once again, my foot twitching with anticipation. Frustration.

The moment the credits began rolling we grabbed our things (things being my purse and that God-send of a sweater) and booked it for the door before anyone could recognize us. As we waited for the elevator I had what can best be described as a full body head rush. It was a strange, dizzying feeling, but not uncommon after a few moments of stroking from Marks blessed fingers.

A minute later we were pulling into an empty lot on Queen, he was driving a white unmarked police car (he had a different one almost every day) and I followed closely in my dirty silver Accent. I parked nearer the street in spot 16 and he pulled in to my left, 17.

I opened his door and hopped in.

Lucky number 17, it was my soccer number back in college. My version of small talk, he would be the one to make the first move tonight.

She shoots, she scores! He smiled and pulled me into his mouth, wrapping his heavy arms around my neck. What a cheese ball, a good kisser, but a cheese ball. His hand lowered to my outer thigh pulling me close. I grabbed his face and kissed as I pushed hard against the floor mat, straightening my legs, rose from the car seat as he slipped my stretchy low rise jeans to my knees before I removed them completely.

He sat back and admired the gleam of my freshly shaved (twice today to be extra sure) legs, lit from the few windows in the HSBC office building nearby.

I want to taste you his look made it clear he was telling, not asking.

I let out an agreeing moan, lifted my legs and placed one foot on the dash, the other on the steering wheel. I grabbed at his shirt while he devoured, tickled, flicked, and penetrated me with his tongue and index.

A quick flash of his hand came to mind, Id noticed in the theater, and for a split second felt a touch of bitternessor maybe guilt. Luckily it was a fleeting feeling. Didnt shake me so much I couldnt pull him up to return the gesture.

Youre so wet baby he moaned on his way back to his seat almost painfully. You make me so hard; you have no idea what you do to me. Ive wanted this for so long.

I rubbed his thick chest and moved my hand down his stomach as I kissed and nibbled his stubbly neck. I slipped a few fingers under his boxer brief waistband with one hand, rubbed his ever growing erection with the other. I wasnt sure which I enjoyed more, him between my legs or this.

I felt like a kid at Christmas ready to open that big gift under the tree. The one you snuck down to shake and examine every night until that over-stimulating morning when you FINALLY get to unwrap it?

I easily undid his belt, button and zipper (impressing even myself, under pressure Ive been known to loose any and all coordination).

Underwear? I looked up, faking surprise, and half-teased Havent I taught you anything?

I forgot to review my notes. He pulled at my hair and I continued fighting with his undergear, pulling them downdown. Ahah! Bingo. Beautiful and long. So hard.
This will be easy I told myself. Oral stimulation was my forte and I was excited to get another crack at it with Mark.

Not since our first night together at work had I got to show off my skill, and that was cut short due tobad timing. But tonight was just us and I couldnt wait to get to start. I swallowed my gum and proceeded.

Have you ever had a fantasy come to life? Thats what this is right now. You have to stop for a moment. Im trembling.

I rose up and began kissing him, keeping the stroking gentle and light. Part of me wanted to finish him off right there, but it would pay to hold off.

I want you to be inside me. Right now. I held his face and looked directly into his eyes. Come here, come on top of me.

We looked around the car, mentally navigating how we were going to do this.

Recline your seat he instructed. His assertiveness had always been so sexy. I love a man whos not afraid to tell me what to do. Back we went. He rose from his seat, pulled off his dark jeans and bbs and carefully mounted me in the passenger seat. His hands rest on the rear seat beside my head.

Slide down he pulled my hips towards him as my feet searched either side of his body for a comfortable place to rest, one chose the window pane, the other found the ceiling would provide the best leverage.

Tell me you want me baby his mouth touching my ear as he whispered.

Oh God, Ive waited so long. I cant wait anymore. I want you inside me baby. Just as I thought I was going to explode he slid inside a soaking wet me.

Waves of tingle spread across my body, growing stronger and harder with every deep thrust, our breathing became simultaneous. I purposely held for a moment, as he continued to exhale I sucked him in, we exchanged breaths back and forth, sharing the thick air between us, our mouths just barely touching. And then he asked,

How do you feel when youre around me?

I smiled and loved that he was always up for a chat during sex. We had some of our best conversations when he was inside me. Closeness you only dream of.

Right now youre feeling pretty damn good I kissed his damp neck and he slowed his rhythm, looked into my eyes and continued, How do I make you feel Tessa? My initial reaction had been a smart-ass one, but this was going in another direction.

You make me feel like Im a better version of myself I whispered in his ear, astonished by my honesty.

You know how I feel about you? he asked. I knew. Wed never said it outloud before. Under the circumstances its not exactly something you toss out there. But lately Id been questioning his feelings. I knew if he didnt tell me soon he never would. I told myself from the begninning I would never ask anything of him, but tonight I needed to hear it,

Tell me. I exhaled.

I cant tell you. I cant go that far He sounded torn.

Why not? I questioned, although already aware of why he couldnt, it seemed by this point hed gone pretty far. Cant blame a girl for trying.

Tessa look at me

But I couldnt. For some reason I could not look in his eyes. I was trying to convince myself that this was just a physical thing, that it was fine he didnt love me, or couldnt tell me, but it wasnt as easy as Id thought. I needed to concentrate on disconnecting myself from him emotionally while continuing to enjoy the great physical pleasure he brought me.

I tried opening my eyes, but couldnt look at him. I was afraid Id turn to stone, or worse, start tearing up. I tried to think dirty, naughty, reassuring thoughts. Anything but I love you. Im in love with you.

I looked at the window. That was hot. We were in our own little 4 door cacoon as the windows had become steamy and sweaty. I reached deep into my stomach and managed to spit out You dont have to say it. You dont have to tell me anything. Its fine. Im fine. I tried to believe it myself.

I placed my hand on the window, leaving my imprint as he started thrusting harder, I thought Phew, got past that. Lets just go back to that dirty, hot sex, enough with all this emotional chow-chow.

I climbed the ceiling with my feet, almost completely folded in two, opening myself more, he was able to penetrate deeper inside. Theresthespot. Ah yes, back to the spot from Toronto. I was losing myself once again, drifting away from any care that he couldnt tell me what I wanted to hear, and then suddenly he stopped. Grabbed my face and turned it to his.

Tessa, youve made me fall in love with you. Im in love with you. Please tell me you love me too.

I finally got to say it outloud. Id been holding it in since Toronto. Able to look into his eyes I told him,

I love you, I am. Im in love with you.

I was trembling. It was almost too much to take and with the fear of tearing up again (at least this time for a good reason) I kissed him, our lips pressed together so hard they mightve burst had we not unlocked for some air. We resumed a new rhythm, a sweeter, deeper, slower I love you rhythm. I wrapped my arms around him and shoved my face into his neck. If it were possible I wouldve actually crawled into his mouth or assimilated through his chest and set up shop in his huge body. Our cellular structure would meld together in blissful unity. I was exactly where I wanted to be. We were one.

Then a horrible doubt washed over me. What if he just said it to please me? How can he love two people at once? What if it was just a statement made during hot sex? None of these seemed like outrageously unheard of concerns.

Are you sure? I had to ask. I had to know.

What? he seemed surprised and again, slowed as he looked at me.

I couldnt look at him.

I need to know if youre sure. If that was real or if I should just write it off as in the heat of the

He took my face in his hand and cut in,

It was real. Tess, I wouldnt say it if it werent real. He paused then sked, Does this change things?

Part of me wished it would, the other was terrified at the thought.