farrah

I give up with him.

He came over two nights ago and while it was so so so nice curling up and making out with him all night, he had to actually leave the room twice because he was getting too worked up and I didn't want to go down that road yet....yes, lots of information.

Yesterday he was flaky in his texts and on the phone, then became downright rude to me around 8 pm.

I went to check out some Boxer puppies, because I feel at least a dog won't cheat on me and I can over look the peeing on the carpet thing...

So he was a complete ass, then called around 11:30 pm to apologize.

I was like, "Yeah. Unhuh. Okay. Thanks."

Hung up, and thought about it for a few minutes, then sent a text telling him that he successfully made me feel like shit, yet again. That if he'd just speak to me like a human being from the start he wouldn't have to apologize, and actually, how about he not speak to me at all. That he is clearly still hung up on his ex Alli, and until he figures his shit out, goodbye."

He simply replied with "Goodbye"

I did have to send one last text (because I'm like that....fuck).

It just said, "I doubt I'll be hearing from you, so good luck in Russia." - - he's competing in the World Raw Powerlifting competition Oct 2nd....yes, he uses lots and lots of steroids.

So. That's it. Didn't hear back from him....contemplating changing my number just so I won't wonder or hope to hear from him.

The messed up thing is that had he told me last night that he did, indeed, want to try again with us, I would have fucking said yes. Why? GUUUUUH!!!!

Anyway, going back to work....possibly going to buy a puppy....despite my parents discouragement in doing so. I want to be tied down. I want to take care of something. I want unconditional love and puppy kisses.