Alone.
it's a tragic word to use to describe yourself.
I could care less about a career. My one goal in life now is to be a boyfriend and eventually a husband. Really, that's been my highest goal ever. To me, my life is meaningless and void without that.
So far, I'm a failure. I've never been in a relationship. To my knowledge I've never even been liked. Is it going to happen in the future? fuck I don't know, but my track record says it's not. 23 and never been kissed, or held hands... I hate this. I hate that I'm sad about this, that it's the only bad thing about my life, AND YET it still makes me crazy depressed that I'm so fucking alone.
When's it going to get any better? Well, hell's already frozen over (at least the bottom parts) and there's no end in sight to the train o' pain for me. I'm trying to get into some social circles, but there's nothing. no one. I'm utterly alone.
I'm not like this around people, though. they ask the staple greeting of "how are you?" and I patently reply "good." It's not like I'm always moody and sad. I'm cheerful around people. Shy and anxious, and always looking at the clock and door, but also cheerful.
Am I that hideous? I'm pretty funny, at least I've been told so. I'm 5'4" though; yeah, that goes over real well with the ladies I bet.
You know what I want most? To be the best boyfriend ever. To listen to my gal's every word; to cook tasty food for her. To cuddle and adore her. I'd cherish my lady to the full extent of word "cherish".
I just don't understand why I've never been liked. It boggles me. I see guys who have girls literally falling over themselves over, girls who revert to preteens with boyband crushes over some guys, and here I am left with nothing but distainful looks and polite dismissals. Why? I can't understand it, and it drives me crazy. At least it used to, but I spent some time insane and now it doesn't affect me that much. I do know that relationships are a two way street, and I can't be doing all the liking, you know? So if I'm ever going to be a boyfriend, it's going to take a girl to like me. And if no one ever has, then I don't see any hope that anyone ever will.
I've met some very sweet and beautiful girls who have had boyfriends that have treated them terribly... I can't nderstand that. Girls, help me out: what do you (collectively speaking) look for in a guy? is it all outward appearance (height, weight, hair, facial characteristics) or is it character, or is it the job he has, or what? I swear, I need some insight.
it's a tragic word to use to describe yourself.
I could care less about a career. My one goal in life now is to be a boyfriend and eventually a husband. Really, that's been my highest goal ever. To me, my life is meaningless and void without that.
So far, I'm a failure. I've never been in a relationship. To my knowledge I've never even been liked. Is it going to happen in the future? fuck I don't know, but my track record says it's not. 23 and never been kissed, or held hands... I hate this. I hate that I'm sad about this, that it's the only bad thing about my life, AND YET it still makes me crazy depressed that I'm so fucking alone.
When's it going to get any better? Well, hell's already frozen over (at least the bottom parts) and there's no end in sight to the train o' pain for me. I'm trying to get into some social circles, but there's nothing. no one. I'm utterly alone.
I'm not like this around people, though. they ask the staple greeting of "how are you?" and I patently reply "good." It's not like I'm always moody and sad. I'm cheerful around people. Shy and anxious, and always looking at the clock and door, but also cheerful.
Am I that hideous? I'm pretty funny, at least I've been told so. I'm 5'4" though; yeah, that goes over real well with the ladies I bet.
You know what I want most? To be the best boyfriend ever. To listen to my gal's every word; to cook tasty food for her. To cuddle and adore her. I'd cherish my lady to the full extent of word "cherish".
I just don't understand why I've never been liked. It boggles me. I see guys who have girls literally falling over themselves over, girls who revert to preteens with boyband crushes over some guys, and here I am left with nothing but distainful looks and polite dismissals. Why? I can't understand it, and it drives me crazy. At least it used to, but I spent some time insane and now it doesn't affect me that much. I do know that relationships are a two way street, and I can't be doing all the liking, you know? So if I'm ever going to be a boyfriend, it's going to take a girl to like me. And if no one ever has, then I don't see any hope that anyone ever will.
I've met some very sweet and beautiful girls who have had boyfriends that have treated them terribly... I can't nderstand that. Girls, help me out: what do you (collectively speaking) look for in a guy? is it all outward appearance (height, weight, hair, facial characteristics) or is it character, or is it the job he has, or what? I swear, I need some insight.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
you know what i mean tho its just im really bad at putting stuff into words. at least i hope you do anyway.
funny is good. ladies love a confident & funny guy (so i have been told).
you can do anything you wanna do dude!