Hi guys,
So firstly I must apologise--yet again I've been a bit inactive even though I said I'd try to be around more. Unfortunately work and uni have both been a bit hectic, plus my crazy life has been even crazier than usual. Always seems to get that way not long after I've said I'll try and be more active on this site too! Haha. Okay, so here's all the updates.
New hair: As mentioned in my previous blog, I recently got a bit bored and frustrated with my overall general appearance again, which is happening more and more frequently. I'm not sure if this is my head's way of telling me that I am dissatisfied with myself and/or my life--but anyhow--I went from the turquoise and blonde to turquoise, blonde and pink; now I've gone from turquoise, blonde and pink to turquoise, blonde, pink and purple. Oh, how I love my Manic Panic colours. Also, as promised in my last blog, here are some photos of the rockin' new do--hope you all like it!
New tattoo: Also in my last blog I mentioned that I was getting a new tattoo. Well, it's now just over a week old and I am totally head-over-heels in love with it! I'd been practically itching for new ink so I'm especially pleased with the work. I love my tattoo artist, she's absolutely amazing. I can go to her with any idea and she creates designs from what I tell her. Currently she's working on the bits and pieces that will be accompanying my latest tattoo to cover the leg area knee-down. Anyway, enough chit-chat about it--here's some pics of my latest tattoo (these pics were all taken when the tattoo was fresh, I haven't taken any since).
@cigno I told you I'd tag you when I uploaded some pics of my new hair and tattoo--this is that tag! Hahaha <3
Sleep and anxiety: My sleep issue was also mentioned in my last blog. This has been a ridiculously huge issue for me of late--and it was made worse very recently by an incident that also caused me to have my first anxiety attack in over a year. I don't want to get into too much detail, but here's a general overview. I live in a small unit with my cat and the direct neighbour is a single female with two children who always seems to have this fuck-wit of a guy around. It seems like a nightly occurrence for him to get drunk and abusive--something that has been steadily driving me insane due to my past experiences and personal beliefs, etc. etc. A couple of days ago an unusual thing happened--he got incredibly drunk during daylight hours. Needless to say, he got drunk and abusive and my anger levels sky-rocketed. He had driven intoxicated with his car doors open and purposefully driven another of our neighbour's off the road, had hit a pole himself, and was standing in my neighbour's front yard being verbally abusive and trying to punch and kick her door down. Then he went to physically abuse the kids--which is where I lost my shit. I cannot just stand there and watch children be hurt. Pretty much, if the cops hadn't appeared when they did I would probably be a pulpy mess in a hospital somewhere. As it was, I managed to hold myself together until the cops, traffic control and tow trucks were gone, until I had my anxiety attack.
This all happened on Sunday afternoon. I didn't get to sleep until Monday morning at 3am--so when my 6am alarm for work went off I knew there was no way I was going. I've had to go back to my doctor who gave me a week off work and is putting me back through a psychologist. From the 3am to 6am Monday morning sleep I didn't get any further sleep until Tuesday morning at 5:30am--and that was only because I had implored a friend to stay with me. He was very sweet in doing so, and I know he was keeping himself awake until I fell asleep so that I would feel safe. I slept from 5:30am to about 12pm (noon) on Tuesday; and then again from 11:30pm on Tuesday night to 7am on Wednesday morning--I slept over at a different mate's place. The last time I managed to fall asleep was on Thursday for two hours--5:30pm to 7:30pm. I didn't sleep from 7am on Wednesday morning until 5:30pm on Thursday late afternoon, and then it was only for two hours.
It is now 1:08am on Friday morning and even though I have no idea how I am functioning, I think I am doing it well. It's like I feel tired but I don't, and I know I don't feel entirely safe--although I don't like admitting it--because the incident mentioned above has only made it that much more difficult to feel okay in this bed (hell, even in my own place in general now) alone. I have some great people around me who are willing to stay with me through the night and who comfort and care for me, and I have great people who allow me to stay with them at their places so that they can care and comfort me in their own ways. I will try and get some sleep soon; I'm hoping that because I haven't slept much lately it won't take too long to nod off.
Sydney shoots: It's almost time! On Saturday morning I'll be flying down to Sydney to shoot with @atlanticlungs :) I'm so very excited to meet her and a great bunch of brilliant Aussie hopefuls, such as: @viridiana13, @wick_ and @twitchling! Here's something you might find a little interesting... I'm shooting two SG Hopeful sets there, one being an ordinary solo set--meaning that the other is... ? Hehehehe. Intrigued? Maybe my next little blog section will spell it out nicely.
Amazing multi sets: I just want to dedicate a small part of this blog to the many absolutely amazing multi sets available here on SG. I spent a pretty decent amount of time looking through a bunch of them for inspiration shots, and I was just seriously in awe. There's so many beautiful babes here on SG, and when they get together... It's just totally mind-blowing. Here's a few multi sets that just really stood out to me--you should really check these out!
After School Special -- I had never come across this set until now, and I already think that this has just got to be my most favourite multi EVER. I mean, hot damn... The story told in these images is just... WOW! It's so creative and so very well done. I love the contrast of the characters and the 'image' they have. Featuring Aisline and Bixton, and shot by Milloux, this set deserves the front page in my definite opinion.
Minuet of Forest -- This set is another that I hadn't come across until now, and is another that just takes my breath away. The softness and intimacy emanating from this set is just divine--and very sweet. This set has such an intimate sensual feeling to it. Featuring Lua and Saria, and shot by Yuxi, this set is another not to miss.
A few of the other amazing multis are -- Adore You featuring Mendacia and Plum, Countina featuring Countessa and Christina, Skate Date featuring Twitchling and Shark_, Mother Earth featuring Damsel and Ackley, Magically Delicious featuring Neptune and Jennings...
There are so many others but I have neither the time nor the patience to list them all!
June mini sets: Back in June when I shot my 1st ever set for the SG MR queue (that currently has 2 months and 2 weeks before it goes live), I also shot two mini sets. All sets were shot by the lovely and talented lady @lizziesky :) On Sunday night (after the traumatic afternoon I had experienced), I received my two mini sets back--and I am so very happy with them. For starters, I love being able to look at my set and my two mini sets and actually SEE that I've had further weight loss since shooting them--about 7kgs of further weight loss actually. I've now lost 29.5kgs all up since May last year (2013) and I'm pleased. Despite being bigger than I am currently am (in the two mini sets I was looking at), I really like the images--especially those from the second mini set for whatever reason. Here's some images from both.
Mini #1
Mini #2
Hehehehehe. I really do love my set and two mini sets--@lizziesky is a legend! <3 Hope you guys like the images I selected from the two mini sets to show you. I love my Jeffery Campbell Back Offs... Not to mention my Black Milk Galaxy dress, my leopard print lingerie, my black lace kitty ears, my Killstar 'Fuck the Westboro Baptist Church' singlet... Hahaha.
#1 Crush: I'm still crushing hard... I still don't think the feelings I'm developing / have developed are reciprocated, but I've come to terms with this because I've realised that at this point I'm just happy to be a part of his life, to be able to call him a friend, and I guess... a 'friend with benefits', haha. We have a good thing going on--whatever it is--and I am appreciative of that. I don't want to fuck it up, and so for now I'm happy just to go with the flow. Still... I'm not going to deny to myself that I have feelings. I just won't think too much on them. Mmm, his smile makes me smile! <3 Hehehe.
Mmkay, I think it's about time that I try and get some sleep now, it's 2:17am. Oops. I guess this blog update is long enough!
Lots of love, Faeviel xxx
