i know that writing and putting up personal happenings of my life does not happen at all anymore but it use to about a year ago when i first joined suicide girls i was so ecstatic to join this site after being a huge fan for so many years and going through a huge break up definitely stoked to fire on my ass to join and hopefully make some worldly connections. That excitement only lasted for a short while when i moved to calgary and the slowly the depression slowly creeped back into my life being over worked ,not enjoying where i was living helped out as well, i tried to escape and run from the situation and become a professional scuba diver but little did i know i just replaced one issue for another. To become a commercial diver you need to do the dive physical and during this they found a major kidney issue that set me back even further on having to move back to my parents for a year.
After that year i still pursued commercial diving determined to push myself further away from all my problems, people and situations i was not ready to deal with, up to this point i had been pushing head strong all on my own allowing any one in diving deeper into the unknown and getting more and more distant from the world as i adventured into the world of diving. Lately things have not been going good for me at all since i moved down here i have been fired once from my dive job because they lost a contract, the company i work for took over the contracts and now i work for them, but i am not happy i enjoy diving but have become tired of the work already it just doesnt interest me at all and i tend to stand there day dreaming about my next tattoo or how to get back into design and web design ways that i can work for myself instead of someone else thumb. To get into diving i clawed tooth and nail to be able to physically manage this kind of work after my surgery i think only to realize it is not at all what i pictured it would of be and also its actually not the best scenario for me in many aspects.
This all funnels to today and selling my truck to buy this 94 cargo van
it may not look like much but to me it is the biggest symbol of freedom to me right now all i want to do is bug it out so i can have a mobile studio in and and start living day to day on the road possibly starting a youtube channel for what happens on my road trips and also get the work out about the art work i want to focus on. So far in one day i have gotten rid of 90% of the junk left by the first owner but i still have a lot to do it with flooring, insulating the walls and eventually solar panels so i can work as i travel.
its not perfect but i can make my own which is beautiful
