eyeballkid

After we fucked, I had a bright idea. "Let's go ghost hunting before I take you home." "Where?" Beth said. "Not out to that Slaughterhouse." "Nah." "I ain't going out there Matt." So when we got there, she was pissed. "Fine, let's go." So I began fucking with her. "I got a bad fealing. Roll your window up. Lock your door. I got a real bad fealing." "Matt, stop it." But I really did have a bad fealing. A minute later we were stuck, the puddle came up to my knee. An old country road, 2a.m., noone around but rapists and Leatherfaces. I thought for a minute, looked at the moon for advice, pissed in a puddle. Then I got a crowbar and a knife out of my trunk. "Take this." I said handing her the knife. "What's this for?" "What the fuck do you think, you stab the first loonie that tries to rape you." "I'm not stabbing anyone." "Fine, get raped. I'm killing someone." So we walked, down Lower Gratis Road. People, I can not explain this road, you just have to see it. It may very well be the scariest road I have ever seen. We walked past a graveyard and saw a house. Huge Weeping Willows stood brooding over the tombs, the bone yard under a foot of water. It's a wonder the caskets didn't rise to the top. "It's the caretaker. You think we should knock?" Just then a car drove by, and I flagged it down. And he stopped. For a wierdo covered in tatoos, waving a crowbar, with a Jawbreaker shirt, outside a creepy graveyard, he stopped. Go figure. Everyone else that drove by stopped. What the hell is wrong with people? Still I was grateful. We called the hill-billy cops and got an answering machine. A fucking answering machine. I *67ed it and called back. "There's a killer in my house, my wife is dead, cut open like a deer. Whenever you guys can show up would be great. No hurry though. Just whenever you check your messages, ah forget it, I'll be dead by then." The guy that pulled over thought that was pretty funny. I didn't. Eventually, my other ex April (Beth's best friend, yes I dated two best friends.) with two guys, a gay guy, which I love, platonically that is, and some dork in a 4:20 shirt. We pushed the car out after about an hour, covered in mud, I sat down in the puddle and looked at the moon again. "It's a shame noone attacked us. Woulda made a good story." "Yeah, whatever." said 4:20 "You owe me a new pair of Jordans."
I'm watching Gummo for the first time right now, and boy oh boy, this movie is amazing. I highly recommend it. Finished another story, called 'Insult Meets Injury'. It's about a guy that shoots himself in the chest and ends up caught in a repeating cycle of ummm, bad stuff, or something. My brain hurts, no more thinking. I got some people coming over, gonna get drunk. Sorry this journal sucks. I'm in an odd mood.
Look at that rabbit! I hate fuckin' rabbits! He smells like pussy. You a fucking queer rabbit?! -Gummo