This is the e-mail I just sent to all my friends from school.
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Hey kids,
I really hate to do this over spring break and I hate even more that I'm doing it via e-mail, but this is the fastest and most effective way to let everyone I really care about at Witt know what's going on.
So... I'm going to take the "rip the band-aid right off" approach and just lay it out now: after spring break, I am not returning to Witt for the rest of the semester. I'll be back the first week and weekend (of Formal) to get things in order, hang out, go to formal and family drinks, pack, and say goodbye to everyone, so you all will have a chance to see me if you like. I will be returning in the fall, but right now, it's best I don't (I'll get more into it later in the e-mail).
Trust me when I say that this was a really hard decision for me to make and I know that at least two of you knew I was in the process of making it (yeah, I really only told Kristina and Ellen, sorry to the rest of ya) and you know that I was really struggling with it. I'm not lying when I say I've made so fucking many pro/con lists in the last month I think I've single handedly forced another tree to be cut down. And, on the top of every pro list I made was listed "friends, sisters I care about, Steve" and you all were a big pull for me to stay, actually one of the few. It's going to be really hard for me not to see you all all the time, but it's what I have to do.
Now, I know I've told some of you about my crazy/ridiculous health situation over the course of this year, but in an effort to keep it out of my mind and not worry all of you I've purposely witheld a lot of information but I kinda feel like you all deserve to know it now. Since coming to Wittenberg freshman year my health has rapidly deteriorated to where I am now: no cold goes around without me getting it, no bug effects me and doesn't have me laid up for days, etc. My mental health, as a result of that, hasn't been doing much better. It's this crazy feedback loop that involves me getting sick then depressed then sicker because of that and then more depressed because I'm sicker. It's crazy, I tell you, and it has to be broken. My doctor(s) have had multiple ideas for what has been causing this deterioration, but so far everything thing has come up blank. Cushing's? Nope (though I'm glad I don't have a brain tumor for sure). Thyroid? Wrong again. Leukemia? No. PCOS? Only partially right. Nothing has explained it, at least not that I've been willing to discuss with anyone yet.
As it stands, right now, it looks like we are delving into the more remote, and often times worse, explanations for what's going on. The newest, though not new to me but new to you, things we're talking about are the possibility of certain types of cancer (please don't freak when you read that, nothing is for sure on that front) or some autoimmune disorder. Both of those categories of illnesses best describe my current health situation and symptoms and are where my doctor and I are headed next.
As you can well imagine, having an autoimmune disorder in the college enviroment would be hell, especially if not yet diagnosed or anywhere near under control, and the idea of cancer is certainly no better. Thus, with the help of my doctor and mother, I've decided that I really do need to stay home. This will expedite the process of diagnosing and curing (or aleaviating) whatever it is that is ailing me. Actually, it was against previous doctor advice that I returned at all this semester, but we all know how stubborn I can be sometimes. :-P
Do not fret, however, for as often as it is possible I will be returning to Witt for major events like the KD initiation, the LCA formal, PFD, senior wills, and random other weekends just to spend time with the people I love. Because, like the say, laughter, happiness, and so forth makes getting better faster and more likely and you guys are a great source of all of that.
So, if you want to find some time to do something that first week back, shoot an e-mail back at me or call my home phone (513-830-6060) or find me when spring break is over and we'll do something.
I love every last one of you and I am so glad to have you in my life.
All my love,
Evy/Big/Little/Roomie/V to the Y/D-Twin
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Hey kids,
I really hate to do this over spring break and I hate even more that I'm doing it via e-mail, but this is the fastest and most effective way to let everyone I really care about at Witt know what's going on.
So... I'm going to take the "rip the band-aid right off" approach and just lay it out now: after spring break, I am not returning to Witt for the rest of the semester. I'll be back the first week and weekend (of Formal) to get things in order, hang out, go to formal and family drinks, pack, and say goodbye to everyone, so you all will have a chance to see me if you like. I will be returning in the fall, but right now, it's best I don't (I'll get more into it later in the e-mail).
Trust me when I say that this was a really hard decision for me to make and I know that at least two of you knew I was in the process of making it (yeah, I really only told Kristina and Ellen, sorry to the rest of ya) and you know that I was really struggling with it. I'm not lying when I say I've made so fucking many pro/con lists in the last month I think I've single handedly forced another tree to be cut down. And, on the top of every pro list I made was listed "friends, sisters I care about, Steve" and you all were a big pull for me to stay, actually one of the few. It's going to be really hard for me not to see you all all the time, but it's what I have to do.
Now, I know I've told some of you about my crazy/ridiculous health situation over the course of this year, but in an effort to keep it out of my mind and not worry all of you I've purposely witheld a lot of information but I kinda feel like you all deserve to know it now. Since coming to Wittenberg freshman year my health has rapidly deteriorated to where I am now: no cold goes around without me getting it, no bug effects me and doesn't have me laid up for days, etc. My mental health, as a result of that, hasn't been doing much better. It's this crazy feedback loop that involves me getting sick then depressed then sicker because of that and then more depressed because I'm sicker. It's crazy, I tell you, and it has to be broken. My doctor(s) have had multiple ideas for what has been causing this deterioration, but so far everything thing has come up blank. Cushing's? Nope (though I'm glad I don't have a brain tumor for sure). Thyroid? Wrong again. Leukemia? No. PCOS? Only partially right. Nothing has explained it, at least not that I've been willing to discuss with anyone yet.
As it stands, right now, it looks like we are delving into the more remote, and often times worse, explanations for what's going on. The newest, though not new to me but new to you, things we're talking about are the possibility of certain types of cancer (please don't freak when you read that, nothing is for sure on that front) or some autoimmune disorder. Both of those categories of illnesses best describe my current health situation and symptoms and are where my doctor and I are headed next.
As you can well imagine, having an autoimmune disorder in the college enviroment would be hell, especially if not yet diagnosed or anywhere near under control, and the idea of cancer is certainly no better. Thus, with the help of my doctor and mother, I've decided that I really do need to stay home. This will expedite the process of diagnosing and curing (or aleaviating) whatever it is that is ailing me. Actually, it was against previous doctor advice that I returned at all this semester, but we all know how stubborn I can be sometimes. :-P
Do not fret, however, for as often as it is possible I will be returning to Witt for major events like the KD initiation, the LCA formal, PFD, senior wills, and random other weekends just to spend time with the people I love. Because, like the say, laughter, happiness, and so forth makes getting better faster and more likely and you guys are a great source of all of that.
So, if you want to find some time to do something that first week back, shoot an e-mail back at me or call my home phone (513-830-6060) or find me when spring break is over and we'll do something.
I love every last one of you and I am so glad to have you in my life.
All my love,
Evy/Big/Little/Roomie/V to the Y/D-Twin