evangelin

I hope everyone is having a wonderful New Year!

I see that I am still in the process of releasing relationships that are no longer aligned with who I am or have become. One of my closest friends continues to disappoint me Always an excuse why she is unavailable and I really had to sit back and be with my feelings today. She is a great person but very reclusive, the person that plans these elaborate outings and then doesn't show up for some reason that is nothing more than her unwillingness to live. Everything is about responsibility and that simply no longer flies with me. Our relationship is and has been for a very long time, unfulfilling. I don't care for drama and I long for connections that bring expansiveness to my world. Our relationship offers none of that. She is a creature of comfort and habit and true to her Cancer nature- moody as shit. I cant tell from one moment to the next where she is. Where I am thankful I dont have to have the "parting ways conversation" in my mind, body and soul, I have had to do that very thing and it saddens me, but I must move out of being stuck and into the new-so I severed the "contract!"

Steph on the other hand has made me the happiest person ever adding me to her companion pass for the year! I am free to now move about at my leisure and my leisure see's enormous travel both domestic and oreign in it!Can't wait to fill my bucket list with adventures..yayyyy me! Honolulu the weekend before my birthday end of the month and Orlando the weekend after for my 40th celebration. I may fly into LA in week and a half to surprise a friend for her birthday, it will be a last minute decision and a quick overnighter if I do. Carnival in Rio is on the maybe list for March as well as a definite trip to wherever Steph chooses for her birthday mid March. Yesterday Iceland was on the table and my nipples froze looking at the video she sent. I'm hoping she changes her mind and goes for anywhere that is not as cold as Jersey right now cause I'm over it

Speaking of over it and Jersey- while in the middle of analyzing data yesterday at work, I suddenly must have popped into my body and realized "I FUCKING LIVE IN NEW JERSEY!" When and how did that happen and how soon can I get the fuck out?! I was pissed as if someone just dumped me here and took the blindfold off. This situation will have to change and quickly!!!

It feels like this will be an epic New Year of adventures and manifesting my hearts desires. I did the work, made the sacrifices and stayed the course, knowing that it would all be worth it. As hard as it all was- I would not change a thing as all the experiences in my life whether they felt good or not, have shaped me into the person I am now. I feel alive and reborn. Finally I see everything I desire being manifested easily into my life. I feel whole and complete and ready to share all of it with the right person. Till then I am eager to explore new faces, places and experiences. Perhaps Mr. Right is on the other side of the world....guess I will find out soon enough

Oh My goodness I almost forgot to share the best moment of the year....well the second best, (the first was a private moment), My grandmothers 90th birthday!!!! After a year of sooo much family turmoil and straight heartbreak, t see her looking so Beautiful, so truly happy and singing. To dance with her as a led her carefully back to her seat was amazing. I couldn't hold back the emotions that rained down on me so I hope everyone taking photos opts out of posting all the ones of me straight sobbing LOL