Thank you for your advice, but I don't think you have much room to give it. I wasn't "asking" anyone anything in writing this journal entry. I was merely putting my thoughts into words, as that tends to relieve some of the tension in an issue, and sometimes opens up more room for realization. I made it public because opinions, like yours, can't hurt. Sometimes people shed a lot of light in places you least expect it.
However, I'm somewhat offended by your "way out of mainstream" and "suppressed emotions" comments. I drew up a timeline marking all of the areas my life has been affected by BDSM... it is not MY LIFE. This is not something that consumes my every thought and action--it is something I enjoy pondering in my spare time. And when I'm not pondering it, I am a perfectly ordinary human being with perfectly ordinary hobbies, and a perfectly ordinary sex life. I am a person, and I think & feel just like you.
So have I seen a psychologist? No. Perhaps I should? Maybe. But please don't *tell* me that the problem (if you can call it that) is worse than it is. I guess, being one of the most expressive people I've ever known, it pokes me that someone would suggest that I deny myself emotion. But since you don't know me, and you don't know any better of the situation, I will try not to take it to heart.
That being said, I appreciate your concern, I appreciate your opinion, and perhaps, if I can ever afford it, I will look into seeing a shrink. But if seeing a shrink--or having reason to--makes me any less human in the eyes of my peers, then fuck that... this isn't Nazi Germany, I don't need to be "solved." I'm just trying to be happy... aren't we all?
i didn't mean to offend or presume, but i have. i apologize. there's an ultimately unhelpful side of me that too quickly offers advice when i don't know a person well enough to do so. i should be sitting back and just listening.
i want you to know that i was in no way judging you as a person. i stopped here on a random stroll through sg precisely BECAUSE you're a deep person with feelings. i'm sorry i angered you, and i sincerely hope you won't keep with you what a random dork like me had to say.
However, I'm somewhat offended by your "way out of mainstream" and "suppressed emotions" comments. I drew up a timeline marking all of the areas my life has been affected by BDSM... it is not MY LIFE. This is not something that consumes my every thought and action--it is something I enjoy pondering in my spare time. And when I'm not pondering it, I am a perfectly ordinary human being with perfectly ordinary hobbies, and a perfectly ordinary sex life. I am a person, and I think & feel just like you.
So have I seen a psychologist? No. Perhaps I should? Maybe. But please don't *tell* me that the problem (if you can call it that) is worse than it is. I guess, being one of the most expressive people I've ever known, it pokes me that someone would suggest that I deny myself emotion. But since you don't know me, and you don't know any better of the situation, I will try not to take it to heart.
That being said, I appreciate your concern, I appreciate your opinion, and perhaps, if I can ever afford it, I will look into seeing a shrink. But if seeing a shrink--or having reason to--makes me any less human in the eyes of my peers, then fuck that... this isn't Nazi Germany, I don't need to be "solved." I'm just trying to be happy... aren't we all?
<3
i want you to know that i was in no way judging you as a person. i stopped here on a random stroll through sg precisely BECAUSE you're a deep person with feelings. i'm sorry i angered you, and i sincerely hope you won't keep with you what a random dork like me had to say.