Well, talked to the recruiter today. Guess, I'm back to the waiting game. More paperwork has to go thru before I can sign, but hopefully I will get that interview taken care of SOON!!!! Sara texted me yesterday. Out of the blue, huh? First said, "I need your address." I gave it to her then asked what was up. She replied, "sending mail." For some reason the post office hasn't figured out that I've left Hawaii and is still sending random bits of mail out there. Feel kinda bad. She doesn't live at that address anymore so she had to have gone out of her way to do this for me, two days before she leaves for Iraq. But, on the other hand I know where she is living now and I hope that place burns to the ground with that dumbass blonde piece-of-shit muscle bound moron in it.
Back to earth. I asked her how she was doing and she told me very busy. I asked her to call me before she left just because I would like to hear from her before she goes. I know it's over, I know there's nothing I can do about it, I know all of this, but I still care about her and I'm very worried. There is a part that truly believes had I done things differently she'd be out of the Army and wouldn't be leaving for Iraq tomorrow. Of course, there's no way to prove this, any number of things could have happened if I'd done things differently and she could still be going, but I can't keep myself from thinking this. And part of me thinks that's why she hasn't called me. Cuz as all the stress of this thing begins to take effect, I think deep inside she is blaming me. I hope not. If she calls I hope to be able to discern some aspect of how she feels about that. But I'm not going to just outright ask her. No point in causing her more stress in what is a very stressful situation. Got to think about what is the right thing to do for her right now.
But it's probably all for not. I doubt she will call. Really. Anyone wanna bet on it??
Back to earth. I asked her how she was doing and she told me very busy. I asked her to call me before she left just because I would like to hear from her before she goes. I know it's over, I know there's nothing I can do about it, I know all of this, but I still care about her and I'm very worried. There is a part that truly believes had I done things differently she'd be out of the Army and wouldn't be leaving for Iraq tomorrow. Of course, there's no way to prove this, any number of things could have happened if I'd done things differently and she could still be going, but I can't keep myself from thinking this. And part of me thinks that's why she hasn't called me. Cuz as all the stress of this thing begins to take effect, I think deep inside she is blaming me. I hope not. If she calls I hope to be able to discern some aspect of how she feels about that. But I'm not going to just outright ask her. No point in causing her more stress in what is a very stressful situation. Got to think about what is the right thing to do for her right now.
But it's probably all for not. I doubt she will call. Really. Anyone wanna bet on it??